Tinder swindler?
Hi Jay-Jay,
A couple of weeks ago, I discovered my partner of 17 months had joined Tinder. I found this out two days before we were due to go on a cruise. We ended up going on the ship and I pretended it didn’t happen, so I could cope and have a good time. Now we are home, I’m having to deal with it all. I feel anxious and sick a lot of the time.
He tells me he was only on there looking – or “perving”, as he calls it. He said he had no intention of talking with or meeting anyone. I find that almost impossible to believe. He says he loves me and I mean everything to him. Should I believe him? Should I trust him again? How do I do that?
Gina, Waikato
Oh, Gina!
Shhh. Can you hear that? Every single woman reading this is yelling the same thing right now: “Dump his arse!” This guy is an absolute player. You know this. You just need me to reassure you.
Nobody who is happy with their partner would even think about downloading Tinder, let alone actually doing it. Also, there is a bit of admin involved in signing up, so he was definitely well aware of what he was doing.
He has disrespected you 100% and through his language (“I was just on there perving!”) shows he disrespects the women on Tinder too. This guy is not relationship material and, lucky for you, you have found this out before you commit to marriage or babies.
We women have this amazing gift – we have incredible instinct. It’s our sixth sense. Follow yours. Assert your confidence and tell him it’s over.
You deserve better.
Enjoy being single for a little while and when you’re ready to find love again, maybe avoid Tinder. As your soon-to-be-ex has shown, there are too many sleazy womanisers on there!
All my love, Jay-Jay
A problem shared is a problem halved! Send your sticky situations to Jay-Jay – email [email protected].
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