Not long ago, most people wouldn’t have had a clue what you were talking about if you used the term “manosphere”.
These days, however, more of us are familiar with the word, thanks to TV shows such as Adolescence and documentaries by the likes of Louis Theroux that have highlighted the online movement promoting the idea that men are hard done by because of feminism.
Now there’s a new word to add to your lexicon: femosphere. It’s a group of online communities that have emerged in response to the manosphere. But the jury still seems to be out on whether the femosphere is a commendable stand by women against toxic male ideology or if it’s equally problematic.
Before we delve into what the femosphere involves, here’s a recap of what the manosphere is…
What you need to know about the manosphere
It’s a collection of websites, blogs and online forums promoting masculinity, opposition to feminism and often misogyny. It includes men’s rights activists and incels (involuntary celibates) who may have different agendas to each other but are generally united in the belief that society is biased against men thanks to feminism, and that feminists promote hatred of men.
Acceptance of these ideas is described as taking the “red pill” – a reference to the movie The Matrix, where swallowing a red pill opens the taker’s eyes to what is really going on in the world.
The manosphere has been accused of radicalising men into misogynist beliefs, and is associated with online harassment and glorifying violence against women. It has been linked to crimes, including the 2014 Isla Vista killings in California, in which a man shot students at a sorority house because he wanted to punish women for rejecting him.
One of the most prominent figures in the manosphere is extremist influencer Andrew Tate. The self-described misogynist is currently awaiting civil trial in the UK over sexual assault charges and is under investigation for human trafficking in Romania. He describes women as a man’s property and says rape victims should bear some responsibility for their attacks.
The manosphere stems from the so-called men’s liberation movement of the ’70s, itself a response to women’s lib in the ’60s. In the 2000s, growing internet use and the reach of social media enabled the spread of virulent anti-feminism, misogyny and violent language.
So what is the femosphere?
The term was coined by British feminist media researcher Dr Jilly Boyce Kay in a paper she wrote in 2024. She defined it as a loose network of female-centric online spaces that emerged from 2018 onwards, partly in response to the manosphere. The #MeToo movement also helped to inspire these communities.
There are many different groups within the femosphere, including blogs, websites, podcasts and discussion forums. People who take part include influencers and podcasters who have built
up large followings, offering the likes of dating advice.
Some of the groups have views that seem at odds with each other, but what they do have in common is the ideology that women should be putting themselves and their needs ahead of men. Often men are considered useful only when it comes to providing financially, and women are encouraged to be very selective and calculating in choosing a “high-quality” mate.
Instead of using the red pill to describe becoming aware of their situation, femosphere fans talk about the “pink pill philosophy”, which encourages women to see men as the problem sex.
What’s good about the femosphere?
Many supporters and femosphere influencers say it’s positive because it is all about empowerment of women. It encourages self-worth, setting boundaries and striving for higher standards in relationships. Among dating recommendations is the advice to never put up with bad behaviour and to walk away from a relationship at the first sign of red flags, such as disrespect.
One key message emphasises the importance of independence. Women are reminded their life doesn’t need to revolve around men – you can have a fulfilling life thanks to your career, hobbies, and relationships with friends and family.
The femosphere includes online communities that give women a platform to share experiences and support each other, which is particularly valuable to people who are isolated or feel they can’t talk to those around them about issues they’re dealing with. This provides a chance for open discussion on subjects like motherhood, careers, relationships, mental health and menopause.
What’s bad about the femosphere?
Some parts of it have extreme ideas about men and relationships, promoting resentment and even hatred towards men. Critics say it suggests many blokes are worthless, selfish and interested only in sex.
A large section of the femosphere focuses on advice about finding a partner, and a key message is that women should be more cynical and ruthless when it comes to the opposite sex. Some influencers specify women should only date men who can provide for them financially. Some say this risks turning dating into a transactional or manipulative experience that is all about strategy, rather than emotions and finding someone you genuinely connect with and care about.
Two American academics who analysed online women’s communities found the extreme ones mirrored views found in the manosphere. For example, they had similar takes on dating strategy, says Professor Emiliano de Cristofaro, with the outlook that “it’s a game, and you try to outsmart each other and win.”
Contradictory to some of the femosphere advice about women being independent and having the same opportunities as their male colleagues, factions within it suggest women should focus on finding men able to provide for them financially and not care about their own career or earning ability. That undoes years of fighting by women for equality, say equal rights advocates.+
What are some key femosphere messages?
One of the leading groups in the femosphere is Female Dating Strategy (FDS), which started as a forum on Reddit and expanded into social media and podcasting.
Its core messages include:
- To have a successful relationship, you must become a high-value woman, achieving independence and high self-worth so your life doesn’t revolve around men, and you don’t compromise your standards.
- Avoid casual relationships. Vet all potential partners ruthlessly, taking a calculated approach to who is suitable.
- A man must pursue you. If he expects you to pursue him, he’s not genuinely invested.
- Leave at the first sign of unacceptable behaviour, like mixed signals or lack of communication.
- Withhold sexual intimacy until you have a clear commitment from him.
- Life is about the survival of the fittest. Because men usually end up hurting women, have strategies in place to get the better of them.
- You need to seek men who will pay for you – don’t date those who are “financially challenged”.
Has feminism backfired?
According to many femosphere influencers, the liberal feminist movement of the 1960s and ’70s turned out to be a disaster for women. The push for equality may have won us the right to have a career instead of the traditional role of stay-at-home wife and mother, but it’s left us working a “double shift”. We’re now saddled with the burden of earning a living while still being the main child caregiver and housekeeper.
Meanwhile, critics say sexual liberation has done us no favours as it diminishes women in the eyes of “high-value men”. Dr Kay, the academic who coined the femosphere term, says one of its key messages from influencers is that feminism is a con.
“Liberal feminism, they say, wants women to think that they can be like men, participating in the public sphere and being sexually active in the same way men are. But there are costs for women that
there aren’t for men.”
A return to traditional roles
One controversial group included in the femosphere comprises tradwives, who push for women to find a man they can depend on financially so they don’t have to work.
The tradwife (traditional wife) movement started in the early 2020s on social media, particularly TikTok, with women who chose a traditional gendered role as stay-at-home wives and mothers sharing videos of themselves doing domestic tasks, like cooking and cleaning. They say being a tradwife is putting yourself first because you get to walk away from the stress of the rat race and leave earning an income up to your male partner.
US-based feminist theorist Dr Sophie Lewis says the femosphere’s rise is a direct response to the failure of feminism.
“The so-called trad life is genuinely seductive to women who rightly hate the endless grind.”
But there are concerns that at its most extreme, the tradwife movement may encourage women to be submissive to men and promote a patriarchal society where women lose their independence. And this is something that the manosphere wants to achieve.
Femosphere terminology
HVW: High-value woman.
A woman who prioritises self-worth, standards and boundaries.
HVM: High-value man.
An emotionally mature and stable man who is respectful, loyal and will provide for you financially.
LVM: Low-value man.
He will expect you to contribute equally financially, run hot and cold, and put low effort into a relationship.
Femcel: The female equivalent of an incel (a man who is involuntarily celibate). They’ve been unsuccessful when it comes to dating and relationships, and feel marginalised.
Pickmeisha: A woman who seeks approval from men by altering her personality to appeal to them, and puts down other women.
WGTOW: Women going their own way. This is the female equivalent of MGTOW in the manosphere, with female advocates opting out of having anything to do with men.
De-centring: Not making men the focus of your life.
Dark feminine energy: Possessing confidence, mystery, intelligence and control. This is seen as the best way of attracting a high-value man.
