Photos: Amalia Osborne
Authors Hira Nathan and Jessie Eyre know first-hand how meaningful a written record of memories with family can be.
The close friends both lost parents at a young age and for Jessie, a box of letters her dad wrote continues to be one of her most treasured belongings – and an inspiration for the children’s wellbeing journal Piki Te Ora she and Hira have written together.
“My mum Helen passed away when I was six from breast cancer and my dad Stuart passed away from a heart attack when I was 17,” shares primary school teacher Jessie, 43. “They were both amazing parents and I always say I had real quality parents but not the quantity.
“We had missionary friends overseas my dad wrote letters to. For my 21st birthday, they gave them back to me and having his letters, seeing his handwriting and reading all the normal things he was up to, I could really hear his voice.”
This record of largely day-to-day happenings capturing a snapshot of her father’s life highlighted to Jessie how important it is to keep a written record.
“It’s about celebrating the ordinary because when something goes wrong, all you want is the ordinary back,” she muses.
An electrical engineer by day, Hira also lost his father, Hira Senior, to a heart attack in 2008.
“It’s pretty unbelievable it’s been 15 years,” says Hira, 43. He has also published Whakawhetai, the successful gratitude journal for adults. “I still think about him heaps. I have a couple of old t-shirts of his and the same photo everyone has. However, I don’t have anything that’s special for me. It would have been cool to have something like this pukapuka [book] to look back on.”
Jessie adds, “Both Hira and I have had challenges, but we had really cool childhoods too. Hopefully this book inspires others to make time to connect as a family.”
They both dream of Piki Te Ora – which incorporates te reo Māori and matauranga (knowledge) in an accessible way – being used by children and their parents to create a meaningful time stamp of family life, while also encouraging them to appreciate simple joys.
“I grew up in Rānui. My entertainment was my tree in the backyard and a creek down the back, where my dad made a rope swing,” smiles Jessie, who is also a marriage celebrant.
Being outdoors in nature makes up most of Hira’s core happy memories too.
“I just thought it was normal going to the marae, the beach and diving or going bush,” he says. “It was nothing special, but when I think back, it was amazing.
“It’s about bringing it back to reality. The park, and making kai at home with your whānau is still fun, and kids still love going to the beach.”
As an adult, Hira has rediscovered the joy of getting out in nature. It started in 2015 when he set a resolution to stop drinking alcohol for a year.
“I gave it up and did all of this mindfulness stuff, journaling, setting intentions, breathing and exercising. It felt really good,” he explains.
“I did it for a year, then went straight back to what I was doing before. I felt rubbish, but the difference was I was aware of it. Before that, rubbish felt normal.”
Now he has a non-negotiable daily gratitude and mindfulness practice – as does Jessie – and while it’s come as a surprise to his workmates on site, it’s had a positive impact on many of them too.
“I think there’s a change happening,” he explains. “My old man was pretty stoic and didn’t talk much about emotions. I know he loved me, but he didn’t say it a lot – he just showed me with actions.
“People are more aware now. A lot of the fathers at work want to make special memories with their kids and tell them they love them.”
As a teacher, Jessie sees first-hand what children these days are dealing with. Especially with the increased pressure and comparison that comes from social media. But with so much positive feedback on Piki Te Ora from her friends and students, who helped consult on the book, she’s excited for the future.
“Kids are exposed to a lot, but they’re also aware of mental health. It’s cool being able to produce a resource for them at their level,” she says.
“I want this book to be a conversation starter for tamariki and their whānau about cool memories, the times they’ve faced tough things and how they got through it.”
Piki Te Ora is available now online and in stores, rrp $29.99.
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