**Dear Wendyl,
**I’m in my sixties and my husband died two years ago. I’ve found that since he has gone, I have no friends because our social life was always based around him and, to be honest, I don’t think I was very nice. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking back – I know I was rude and mean to people in the past, so I don’t blame them for not wanting to spend time with me. But I’m willing to change because I really can’t stand being so lonely. Do you have any suggestions?
*Lonely Senior, Whakatane
*
**Dear Lonely Senior,
**It’s never too late to change and I think, from what you have said in your letter, you are ready to do that. I recommend you contact some local charities, schools or organisations that need volunteers. You can practise being nice by helping out with these people and through them you will meet friends and slowly start creating friendships. The charity work will make you feel like you are doing something good with your life and leave you feeling happier. But please, do resist your old behaviours and work very hard at being a loving, kind and considerate friend.
Send your questions to [email protected] or write to Agony Aunt, NZWW, PO Box 90119, Victoria St West, Auckland 1142.