Dear Wendyl,
I have a mother who is 98 and in care. Her sight and hearing are bad and every time I visit it’s really depressing to see that her quality of life has been reduced so much. Last time I saw her she told me that she wanted to die. She said she had nothing to live for, considered she’d had a good innings and just wanted to end it. I found it very upsetting, but I could see her point. Her life really is no fun and her body isn’t up to much except sitting and watching TV. I didn’t know what to say so I just told her she was being silly, but I wondered if I should talk to her doctor about it? What do you think?
Judy, Whangarei
Dear Judy,
This is such a tough one for you, yet something many families go through. You can’t help her die, as much as you agree with her, because it is illegal. But you can try to improve her quality of life as much as you can. Do talk to her doctor – I have no doubt she is depressed. Also talk to her carers and ask them for advice as they see her every day. Something as simple as taking her for car rides might lift her enjoyment of life a little.
Send your questions to [email protected] or write to Agony Aunt, NZWW, PO Box 90119, Victoria St West,Auckland 1142.
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