Real Life

The 11 stages we’ve all gone through waiting for the election results

New Zealand has waited almost a month for Winston Peters, Bill English and Jacinda Ardern to tell us what is going on with the election.
James Shaw, Jacinda Ardern, Winston Peters, Bill English election results

New Zealand is waiting with baited breath to find out the results of the election. Or at least we are meant to be. Everyone’s a bit bored now really.

We understand that this is an important and necessarily top secret issue, but come on, Jacinda Ardern, we thought you were putting us out of our misery with that wink, and Bill English you seemed a little cranky on telly the other night, we really thought we might have a government by now.

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Honestly though, at this stage we are more concerned with Married At First Sight than who Winston Peters picks. Well, not really – but we are super salty about the whole deal at this stage…

To illustrate our frustration/boredom and general done-ness, we have outlined all of the stages we have gone through in the last month.

Otherwise, think of it as the 11 stages of waiting for someone to text back which is how this feels. Hint. Hint.

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Whether your team was going to win or not, the buzz round election night was palpable. All of New Zealand heads into pubs and living rooms to tune in and either celebrate or drown their sorrows. Kind of like a rugby game that effects your life much, much more.

Wait, what??

When the initial results were announced we didn’t know what to do or how to feel. Do we have another glass of wine or go home? Are they going to tell us? So many questions, so few answers.

Did this just get interesting?

After election night it looked like it might not be too long till the announcement. So we sat back and enjoyed the drama thinking it would be over soon.

Oh, no, it didn’t

We thought this might be an interesting process to watch, but it was all taking a bit long. So we put all our energy into Bird of the Year instead…

Polite waiting

Yeah we were still invested. In the first few days after the election there was good-natured acceptance that we had to give our leaders some time to sort themselves out. Laughs were had, we committed to chilling about it for a few days. We weren’t over the moon about it but we knew it wouldn’t be long. Boy were we wrong.

So we waited.

and waited…

and waited.


At this point, we are a bit over it to be quite honest. Just tell us. We know it is too important to rush, but come on. Winston would appear once and every so often to say “not yet” and each time, this is the face we made.

Ignoring it for a while

A watched kettle never boils and a watched Winston never decides.


Ok guys, you can tell us now.

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