Photography: Neil Mackenzie, Stephen A’Court.
As six-month-old Kai Tanigaito lies on his playmat, happily kicking at the toys above him, it is hard to imagine the traumatic start to life he had or the ordeal his mother, celebrated Royal New Zealand Ballet principal dancer Mayu Tanigaito, endured in bringing him into the world.
Mayu’s pregnancy was blissfully straightforward. She suffered no morning sickness or complications, and was still dancing in pointe shoes until three weeks before her due date. Like many first-time parents, she and husband Paul, himself a former principal dancer with the national ballet company, had envisioned a calm, natural birth. But those hopes were dashed when, after 20 hours of labour, her waters broke and there was meconium in it.
The first stool a newborn passes, if a baby inhales this fluid, it can lead to serious breathing problems. What followed was a further 11 long hours of intense labour – with Kai under observation – for the petite ballerina. Paul remembers the growing dread as Mayu’s pain intensified. Despite being fully dilated and trying so hard, the birth wasn’t going to plan.
A frightening delivery
“Kai’s heartbeat started slowing because his head was too big and he wouldn’t come out,” explains Paul.
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“I was scared,” Mayu admits.
“Not for myself, but I was hoping my baby was safe. It was the worst part for me.”
A scary turn in labour
With the situation worsening, doctors finally decided an emergency Caesarean was needed. Kai, whose name means “ocean” in Japanese, finally entered the world with a strong, healthy cry, but Mayu lost a significant amount of blood and went into shock.
“She was shaking and really cold,” recalls Paul.
“It was scary. They handed Kai to me because she wasn’t in any state to hold him.”
Mayu, who was flooded with intense feelings of relief despite her own health struggles, says her precious son’s birth remains hazy.
A blur of first moments
“It’s all a blur,” she says.
“I just remember thinking, ‘Oh, he’s okay.’”
Once medical staff had stabilised Mayu, she finally got to experience that special first motherhood moment with her newborn son.
“I couldn’t have imagined giving and receiving such unconditional love until I became a mother,” she says.
Coping with postpartum pain
But Mayu’s challenges weren’t over. The day after Kai’s birth, she was hit with excruciating pain caused by the C-section.
“It felt like burning inside,” she reflects.
“For a couple of days, it was unbelievable.”
The 38-year-old required strong hospital-only medication, and remained in a ward for five nights before doctors were happy to let the new mother go home and finally begin their family journey. Thankfully, it has been joyfully drama-free with hands-on dad Paul supporting his wife while juggling a brand-new role at his corporate job, which he says is made possible by the flexible work and family policies available to him at Contact Energy.
A dream baby makes life easier
“I was nervous about the sleep deprivation,” he admits.
But to their astonishment, Kai has slept through the night from just four weeks old.
“We’re blessed because Kai is a dream baby.”
So much so that Mayu, the longest-serving current principal dancer with the Royal New Zealand Ballet, has been able to return to the stage much quicker than she thought. She is currently enchanting audiences with her performance as the Sugar Plum Fairy in the Royal New Zealand Ballet’s production of The Nutcracker, which is touring the country in the lead-up to Christmas.
Motherhood adds depth to dancing
Mayu admits that being on the road is more complex these days, so she has enlisted the help of her mum while she’s on the road and performing. Mayu says motherhood has given her dancing a new depth.
“I love being on stage, connecting with the audience,” she explains.
“It feels like my time – my moment.’’
A meaningful choice
It is a connection Paul, 38, who retired from the national ballet company in 2022, understands well. When the pair married, he made the unusual yet deeply meaningful decision to take Mayu’s surname, Tanigaito. Having little connection to his own family name and wanting to honour Mayu’s stage career, it felt right.
The couple’s bond began back in 2012, shortly after Mayu joined the Royal New Zealand Ballet. Paul was immediately captivated by her grace, while she admired his strength and kindness. Their shared Japanese and Kiwi heritage inspired them to marry twice – first in Auckland’s Parnell Rose Gardens in 2017, then in Kyoto. Paul’s mother and sisters flew over and wore traditional kimonos.
“It was a typical Japanese wedding, which was lovely,” says Mayu.
Joy after fear
Looking at baby Kai, who is cooing from his mat, it’s hard to believe how his life began. But for this devoted pair, the fear of those first hours has only strengthened the joy of every day since.
“He’s our beautiful little human,” enthuses Mayu.
“And we’re grateful for him – every single moment.”
To buy tickets to Royal New Zealand Ballet’s The Nutcracker, visit rnzb.org.nz
