Photos: Emily Chalk
Nadia Lim will remember 2024 as the year she finally learned to put herself first. After years of “work, work, work until it pretty much breaks you”, the Kiwi food star is starting 2025 with a renewed outlook on life, and a promise to slow down to focus on what really matters.
“It really was a year of highs and lows,” says Nadia as she joins husband Carlos, 39, and sons Bodhi, eight, River, six, and Arlo, nearly two, for a family photoshoot at their home on Royalburn Station, the 485-hectare farm between Arrowtown and Cardrona that the couple took over five years ago. “It was time for a big reset and I feel happier now than I have in a long time.”
It’s a stunning summer’s day when the Weekly visits. Nadia’s tribe is in high spirits about the start of the school holidays. Family camping trips, swimming in the river and outdoor adventures on the farm await, and the My Food Bag co-founders are looking forward to a well-earned breather with their little lads.
Life on the land provides an idyllic upbringing for this trio and watching their boys thrive on their slice of rural paradise brings the couple immense pleasure.
“We don’t need to go away to places for our holidays. There’s still so much to explore here,” says Nadia, looking out to the hills that surround the property. “We’ll pack up the tent and head out for a few nights. The boys can go rabbit hunting and catch some eels. They love being outside in nature, as much as Carlos and I do.”
To say they’ve been busy would be an understatement. During the past year, Carlos spent months abroad on a prestigious Nuffield farming scholarship, leaving Nadia, 39, to hold down the fort at home. She was to overseeing farm life, working on her many projects and raising the boys on her own. While it was Nadia who encouraged him to go, she admits she felt pushed to the limit at times.
“I know there are people with far worse things to contend with. Still, I felt like I lost my identity a bit. I was just like, ‘Oh, this isn’t the really effervescent, thriving, vivacious, go-get-’em Nadia that I used to be.’ No, it was the broken, exhausted version.”
It was a worrying experience for the usually optimistic star. She until then had managed her incredible workload with what looked to be super-human capacity. The couple has poured their hearts into Royalburn, transforming the grain-and-sheep station into a fully diversified farm-to-plate operation. They star in their own reality show, Nadia’s Farm, have launched a beer called Swifty and recently bought into grocery store business McKibbon’s alongside their existing Arrowtown farm shop. With so much on, it’s no wonder there was little time for herself. Nadia realised she needed to figure out how to get back to her best. The fix, it turned out, was simple.
“I realised I had to stop being a martyr,” she says. “I had to reset the way I was used to living and start taking better care of myself. There’s no point trying to raise happy and healthy kids if I wasn’t happy and healthy myself. I needed to sort myself out.”
And by sorting herself out, Nadia doesn’t mean anything particularly grand or high-maintenance. She started off slowly, taking a walk during the day, having a quick catch-up with a friend or doing a Pilates class after school drop-off.
“Before, I would have felt guilty or like I didn’t have the time to be doing any of those things,” she explains. “I would get straight into the work day, and felt like I needed to be ‘doing’ and ‘achieving’ during the work hours. And afterwards, it was about looking after the kids. I felt like I never earned a break, but that was quite childish and immature, I guess. So this year has definitely been a year of learning that, hey, it’s not selfish or a weakness to actually have a little breather for yourself. The world won’t fall over.
“And actually, me being in a good space has made everyone around me happier too. The kids have their fun, happy mum back.”
Nadia attributes her workaholic tendencies to her beloved dad Ken, who sadly passed away in 2014 after a battle with cancer. The Chinese-born, Malaysian-raised civil engineer moved to New Zealand in search of a better life and instilled in his family a strong work ethic.
“Being a Chinese immigrant from a poor family, he started with absolutely nothing, so he had to work his butt off,” she explains. “And Dad always drilled into us that there’s never actually time to rest. Like, if you have the capacity to keep doing, you keep doing. You don’t let up.”
While she’s grateful to have inherited her dad’s drive, she’s now happily adapting the “never stop” mentality. That’s not to say it’s been an easy habit to break.
“Slowing down and putting yourself first takes a bit of practice,” she says. “It feels awkward and weird at first, but then you get used to it. And you realise it really does make a difference.”
Nadia is also trying to have realistic expectations, acknowledging the impact of three babies in a short space of time on a woman’s body.
“You can’t underestimate the role of hormones. You also can’t expect everything to just magically be back to normal after you’ve had a baby and been breastfeeding, especially with the sleep deprivation. It all plays into each other. I was completely depleted. But what I’ve learned is that it doesn’t take a lot to feel better again. I’ve only had to make small changes over the course of six months or so. I’m nearly back to my old self.”
Now she’s taking time to exercise regularly and spend time doing things simply for her. She and Carlos have even managed a couple of nights away on their own. In August, Nadia even went on a solo trip to Bali.
“I’d always told myself there was no way I could leave the kids. That it wasn’t fair on them or Carlos, but I see now that was ridiculous,” says Nadia.
“The kids were fine and I had the best time. I pretty much did nothing but lie by the pool and read books for a week. Oh, and I went and got a couple of tattoos!” she says, showing us her new body art. There’s a hibiscus flower (the national flower of Malaysia) on her left ribcage and a symbol on her arm, representing her family.
Nadia is looking ahead to the new year with her usual positivity and verve. Being her best for her children is keeping her motivated with healthy eating and regular exercise, and she and Carlos have made a goal to be the fittest they’ve ever been when they celebrate their 40th birthdays in 2025. They’re planning to ring in the new decade with a trip away together. After spending close to four months apart in 2024, they’ve realised just how important it is not to take each other for granted.
“I know this sounds soppy, but the time apart really reminded us how much we love each other,” she says.
But it’s family life that makes Nadia happiest and she loves being a mum of boys, despite the noise, chaos and occasional punch-ups. Bodhi is sensitive and loyal, River is hugely curious and interested in the world around him, while little Arlo is already the toughest of the bunch.
“The big boys get pretty physical with each other quite often, which I’m told is normal for brothers. But they’re also really good mates and they all have so much fun together.”
While people said a third child would be a breeze, little Arlo has been the trickiest of the three. He took the longest to sleep through the night and is going through a clingier stage than his big brothers. That said, there’s no doubt he’s the apple of his mum’s eye. She jokes that she’d like to “press pause” on him right now because he’s just so darn cute.
“He comes into our bed in the morning and he’s so snuggly and gorgeous. I just think, ‘I don’t want this to end,’” she smiles.
While Nadia and Carlos had fleeting dreams of adding a fourth child to the mix, they’ve decided that ship has sailed. “We realised three keeps us busy enough!” she laughs.
But raising her brood on the land is something she’ll never take for granted. Every day there are adventures to be had, stray ducklings to take care of, animals to feed and veges to be eaten straight from the garden.
“This is what life is really about,” says Nadia. “I’m so grateful for my boys and for this environment to raise them in. We’re very lucky.”
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