Libby Matthews’ pregnancy page: Why I’m not finding out the gender of my baby

In her exclusive pregnancy column, Libby Matthews shares why she decided to keep her unborn baby's sex a surprise.


Libby Matthews is a first-time mum-to-be, who along with sister Julia, has inspired Kiwis with the popular lifestyle blog, Julia & Libby. Over the next few months, Libby will share the highs and lows of her pregnancy with us here at the Weekly.

This week I’m 34 weeks pregnant and the baby has already dropped. This means a welcome relief from the pressure on my lungs and stomach, I can finally take a deep breath and I’m able to eat a proper meal without feeling full after a few bites. However, it also means extra pressure on my pelvis and bladder so exercise has become uncomfortable and a good night’s sleep is non-existent due to the multiple bathroom breaks.

My mum keeps reminding me that that this is all just my body’s way of preparing me for all the sleepless nights I’m about to encounter!

I’m feeling more and more ready for the baby to come and fingers crossed these next few weeks pass by in a flash. Being a first time Mum is exciting and amazing, but also a little scary.

WATCH: Gender reveal party goes wrong. Story continues after video

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My whole life is about to change forever and during pregnancy you try to learn everything you can about the baby growing inside of you. Every morning I check my pregnancy app to find out some new pregnancy facts. I’m also reading a book on pregnancy and I find myself constantly reading pregnancy information online. Anyone else the same?

I knew from the moment I found out I was pregnant, I wouldn’t find out the gender of my baby, mostly because I don’t have a preference of gender. As much as I love to plan, I also love surprises.

After speaking to my gynecologist, he said that 90 per cent of couples find out the gender at the earliest possible moment which can be around 18 weeks into their pregnancy.

These days with social media, smart phones and the internet, surprises in life are rare and most of the time we know a surprise before it happens. Not finding out your baby’s gender is one of the rare moment sin life where you get to be surprised.

Birth is such a magical moment and finding out for the first time whether it’s a girl or boy at the birth is going to magnify that moment.

Don’t get me wrong, it hasn’t been easy not finding out and when I tell people that we don’t want to know there are always mixed reactions. Some people think it’s a great idea, others think it’s silly and annoying.

Other people think they can determine what I’m having going on the foods I’ve been craving, if I’ve morning sickness or not, where on my body I’ve gained weight and how high I’m carrying, (carrying high is meant to mean you’re having a girl).

I’ve never met so many baby experts!

Lastly, people think it’s strange how I don’t want to find out because I can’t decorate the nursery in the appropriate colours. We’ve gone for neutral colors in the nursery with a safari theme. These days’ gender neutral clothes are so easy to buy, and as babies grow out of stuff so quickly we’ll have plenty of trips to the shop when he or she is born.

I’m so glad we’ve waited to find out our baby’s gender, it adds a bit more anticipation around the birth and I know the surprise will be worth the wait.

I’d love to hear whether you found out or waited for the surprise, and why.

L x

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