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To the woman who told plane mum to ‘shut your child up’

A lesson in empathy.
Woman blocking her ears

Woman blocking her ears

Earlier this week, mum Nicola Colenso was flying from Ibiza to the UK when her child began crying.

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Her daughter, who suffers with epilepsy, autism and sturge weber syndrome, was actually very unwell. And after Nicola and her family were told to “shut their child up,” as well as being sworn at by a fellow female passenger, the mum took to Facebook to express her outrage.

“Dear Lady on the Manchester bound flight from Ibiza yesterday,” the post begins. “We are sorry our daughter stopped you from getting your beauty sleep but clearly she was having a meltdown and was not feeling 100%.

“As you felt the need to turn round and ask us to “shut that child up” this didn’t help her anxiety levels or ours in trying to manage the situation.

“We explained her situation to you very politely and said we are sorry if she is causing a problem and maybe ask if she could to be moved? This resulting in you repeating that you were “sick of the noise and can’t you just shut her up!” You continued to be abusive and publicly called her Daddy a “PRICK” in front of her and her other 3 siblings.

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“Your behaviour and outburst was not helpful what so ever in helping to calm down our daughters anxiety. I hope social media helps for this post to find you to let you know that same little 8 year old girl ended up being taken to hospital by ambulance that evening as she became seriously unwell. Maybe you managed to get a good night sleep?”

Mum trolled after posting picture of toddler online

NEXT Chief Sub-Editor Maria Hoyle, writes that we should empathise with mothers, not chastise them.

***Let’s get one think straight. There are few sounds more guaranteed to julienne your nerves than a screaming child. And I say that as a mother, a veteran of trying to calm kids in meltdown at the supermarket, on a flight, at a party, indeed anywhere – but usually, funnily enough, where there is an audience of at least three other mothers, with their own well-behaved kids in tow.

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There are two things that are certain in parenthood: a) Your child will have a meltdown b) They will not ask you to check your calendar to see when is the most convenient time for them to scream. They will just do it. So to the passenger who told British mum Nicola Colenso to ‘shut up’ her screaming child on a flight from Ibiza to the UK, I know how annoyed you felt. Yes, I really do. What I don’t get is what part of the scene unfolding before you, you didn’t understand. Whether you perhaps left your ability to empathise on the bedside table at your Spanish resort, or perhaps traded it for a tan.

Because it doesn’t take much to see that a woman with four kids, one of them screaming blue murder, isn’t making her child scream just to annoy you, or to mix things up a little. She is struggling.

Of course you weren’t to know that Colenso’s daughter Yasmin, eight, also has a rare condition affecting the skin, brain and eyes. Or at least not until Nicola did put you straight after you yelled your abuse. Neither did you know that later that day Yasmin would be taken to hospital because she had become very sick. You weren’t to know that. So how about this. How about next time you hear a child or baby screaming, you say to yourself ‘I know nothing about this family. For all I know that child could be sick. Or maybe the air pressure is hurting their ears. Poor parents. Poor child”. Then you plug in your earphones, turn the music up and thank god you have only yourself to think about.

Better still, you could even give the mother an empathetic smile.***

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