Co-ordinating a family of eight like the Milua family is a challenge at the best of times – but when half a dozen of the whānau is training for an international karate competition, precision planning is key.
“It’s like a military operation,” jokes father- of-six Haku Milua. “Our dining room looks like a war room, with whiteboards with arrows and markers, and descriptions and times to the minute.”
It’s this same structure and self-discipline that led Haku, 49, into martial arts and a move to Tokyo as a teen, where he went on to meet his wife Momoko.
“I love Japan and the structure,” he explains. “I went to Japan and trained there. Suddenly 23 years had passed!”
Friends introduced him to Momoko, now 36, who is also an accomplished black belt, and they married in 2007, in her hometown in Fukuoka, South Japan, a sister city to Auckland.
The pair moved to New Zealand in 2016. There has rarely been a day since when they haven’t donned their do-gi kit and trained – a passion that has been passed down to their children, sons Ouryu, 17, and Alcyone, 15, and daughters, Mira and Mayu, both 12, Mei, eight, and Paikea, six, who have all represented New Zealand in their grades.
This month, the Auckland family is flying back to Japan. There, Haku and Momoko and their four oldest children will compete in the Karate World Finals against 100 other countries for the Funakoshi Gichin Cup.
“We wanted to put the kids in something that had some Japanese culture to it,” says Haku. “They chose karate. It’s just supporting what they want to do and luckily, we’re all doing karate.”
Momoko and Haku’s first four children were born in Japan. There, children start martial arts at age three, and are now all black belts.
Their younger daughters Mei, a brown belt, and Paikea, a green belt, were born in New Zealand and took up the discipline from an early age – but they are too young yet to take part in international competitions.
However, the upcoming championship is still a family affair, with everyone pitching in to raise money for the self-funded trip. There has been plenty of lawnmowing, car washing and selling chocolate, while the boys also work part-time in a café.
They all train seven days a week, with Haku driving his brood around in an eight-seater van they brought back from Japan. They regularly compete in regional competitions across the country.
“We are amping up to this particular championship, doing about two-and-a-half hours a day,” tells Haku. “It can be anything up to six hours on weekends.
“But first they do their homework. Being an IT guy, I have a very strict regime – the wifi is on a schedule. It comes on for 30 minutes and then it goes off for an hour.”
After school, from 3.30pm to 4.45pm, the children do homework, including Duolingo for language and maths as well as music. Then at 5.45pm, they get ready for regular Dojo training. Housework is shared by everyone and it’s not uncommon for their home to be filled with eight racks of laundry.
“Do-gi are thick canvas – they need a deep wash and a proper dry, and you can’t put them in the dryer because they’re 100 percent cotton,” Haku explains.
Momoko, a barista, laughs saying that when she first met Haku, he would do all the domestic jobs, which was a culture shock for her.
“At first, I used to say, ‘What are you doing? That’s my job.’ Now I love that he does everything – cooking, cleaning, washing.”
Haku adds, “I found out later men doing housework is deemed an insult, as if their work isn’t good enough.”
These days, the pair both cook – Momoko loves Kiwi barbecues. They follow a healthy diet, with little oil or salt, and have no sugary drinks in the house.
“New Zealand is a very nice country,” Momoko smiles. “I’d like to stay here forever. In Japan, it’s all about work and no family time. We love to go to the beach and here there is so much more freedom.”
But she is looking forward to seeing her Japan-based parents, who will also travel to Takasaki to help look after the family over the four days of competing.
And it’s not all about the competition. The family are planning Disneyland and Disney Sea trips too. They will then be a reward for their hard work and discipline to get there.
To support the Milua family as they represent New Zealand, visit givealittle.co.nz/cause/help-us-represent-nz-in-japan
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