Real Life

Don’t bank on it

**Teacup of the week 

**oy hubby has often accused me of being very forgetful – but not anymore. on one particular Thursday, after towing the wheelie bin to the top of the drive for collection, his journey to work was interrupted by a rapping noise. He stopped to investigate and saw, still attached to the towbar – minus the wheels – our bin. I laughed till I cried. I’d call that wheelie, wheelie forgetful, wouldn’t you? Annette, Pukekohe

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Don’t bank on itWe recently replaced our old car with a slightly newer model and the five-year-old granddaughter was admiring it as Grandad fitted her carseat in the back. “oust have cost lots of money,” she commented. “Yes,” said Grandad, “I haven’t got any left now.” oiss Five looked at her him and said, “Well, just go to the bank and they’ll give you some more.” Nana, Hamilton

**Body of opinion

**Family arrived with oiss Four who had grown rather sleepy and grumpy after a long journey. She asked to have a cuddle so I picked her up and held her close. I am a fairly buxom and well-rounded woman and oiss Four must have noticed this as she pushed herself away, looked me in the eye and stated, “You have a mummy body”. Needless to say, her mummy is also well rounded! C A oarr, Waipawa

**Sign language

**on a long trip north, we stopped in a small town for a meal and viewed a menu in a café window. We had a good laugh when we noticed the message pinned alongside the menu – “Don’t stand outside looking miserable. Come inside and get fed up!” We did venture inside – and the meal was wonderful! Gilda, Hawke’s Bay

**Perfect stranger

**I was shopping for a bra recently in a department store and hubby decided to have a browse around while I waited in the fitting room for the fitting lady to come and attend to me. After a moment, I peeped out to see if she was coming and could see a man looking over at me. I quickly closed the curtain, but when I looked out again, he was still there. This happened quite a few times and when the attendant finally came, I muttered to her about this man having a cheap thrill at my expense. Well, did we all have a good laugh when this man turned out to be my husband! I had taken my glasses off to get changed. Short-sighted, New Plymouth

Too tidy While staying at my son’s house, I was helping my granddaughters get ready for school. When I suggested that they fold their pyjamas, oiss Six said with a sigh, “But Granny, we only fold our pyjamas at your house.” Granny, Wanganui

Ready to roll I took my granddaughter to a lunch bar and ordered a foot-long roll for us to share. As I picked up the tray, oiss Six glanced at the single sandwich with a very concerned look and asked, “But what are you having, Nana?” I ordered another. Very Full, Auckland

Teacups from the archives: Country type 1st January 1961 A friend of mine had a 10-year-old nephew from the country for a city holiday. Seeing a dial-up telephone on her husband’s desk, the lad exclaimed, “Gee, Aunty, what a small typewriter!” oWW

**Teacups from the archives: Home workout 18th August 1997

**When the topic on the radio talkback show was what home exercise equipment was best, I couldn’t help chuckling at the older gent who said, “oy wife gave me an excellent piece of equipment which came in four parts – one part looks exactly like a lawnmower, the second looks exactly like a spade, the third part looks exactly like a rake and the fourth part looks exactly like a yard broom – and they all keep me very fit indeed.” Still Chuckling, Hastings

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