The concept of ‘good manners’ is one that’s constantly changing. In fact, something that would have easily been the norm fifty years ago, would now probably make you look terribly old fashioned in a contemporary setting.
But while politeness is no bad thing, are there some etiquette rules that we could do without?
Business Insider spoke with business communications expert Barbara Pachter, to find out her view on what manners we really need to ditch.
1.Men do the heavy lifting
This is one of our personal bugbears, the idea that women shouldn’t offer to help carry or lift things. Pachter says the new guideline is that everyone, regardless of gender, should offer to carry packages.
2.Women need help putting on their coats
If someone’s struggling, sure, but why is it assumed a woman isn’t able to clothe herself correctly?
Should we scrap these rules in favour of better equality?
3.Men should open doors for women
“The new guideline is whoever gets to the door first, should open it and hold it for the person behind him or her.” Quite sensible, really.
4.Women need to be helped up and down into their seats
This is just plain unnecessary.
5.Women must order first
Barbara states that whoever the guest is, they should be the ones to order first. So if you’ve called the dinner, allow your invitee to order.
6.Men should pay the bill
There are so many issues surrounding this. But as you guessed it, Pachter says the person who proposed the meal should pay, regardless of gender. We’re more of the opinion that you split, but that’s just us.
7.Writing ‘Dear Sir’ as default
This is just horribly old fashioned. If you don’t know the gender of the person, use something gender neutral such as ‘Dear customer,’ or ‘Dear company representative.’ ‘To whom it may concern sometimes also works.’
8.Women shouldn’t shake hands
Whether you’re male or female, you still need to shake hands. “It’s a business greeting, Pachter confirms.”
“The higher ranking person or the host should extend his or her hand first, to welcome the other person,” she says. “The key is that the handshake needs to take place.”
