AMALIA OSBORNE
It’s a rare and special thing to find a friend for all seasons. Someone to help navigate love, loss, children and the unpredictable winds of life. For Sonia Gray, one of those people is her longtime pal Jaquie Brown.
Even during their Weekly photoshoot, Sonia lights up the moment Jaquie walks through the door. Though life often pulls them in different directions, they both know that no matter how much time has passed, they’re always a safe landing place for one another.
“We don’t see each other all the time – life is busy,” explains Sonia.
“But we can always talk about the deep stuff. Jaquie is a wonderful listener; her heart is the size of a house.”
Jaquie adds, “We’re both trying to understand who we are in the world. Maybe it’s midlife, maybe it’s being a woman, but we’ve both been through a lot. It’s stripped things away and we’re both becoming the true more honest versions of ourselves.”
The pair first met in the early 2000s while working at TV Three. There was an instant ease, and a recognition of generosity and warmth in each other.
“I remember thinking, ‘She’s so beautiful and glamorous,’” says Jaquie.
“It was a surprise to me that she was also a lovely person. For a long time, I was in awe of Sonia. I thought, ‘How is it possible that the universe created this person?’”
Sonia blushes before adding, “When I started, Jaquie always took the time to talk to me. She goes above and beyond to make people feel welcome and comfortable.”
When Sonia began work on her most personal documentary yet, she knew she would need support. It was a no-brainer to ask Jaquie – and the third member of their tight-knit trio, entrepreneur and I Love Pies co-founder Jessie Stanley – to be part of it. Mind Menders follows Sonia as she searches for relief from her anxiety, exploring the emerging field of psychedelic treatment. As part of the journey, she participated in an eight-week LSD microdosing trial and underwent ketamine-assisted therapy in a controlled setting through a University of Otago study.
The concept was initially daunting for the Lotto host, who admits she was naive about drugs.
“I thought it was like [movie] Trainspotting,” laughs Sonia.
“I know that cannabis is different, but I thought everything else was the same risk as heroin.”
Though she is no stranger to sharing her life with Kiwi audiences, she admits it has become more difficult over time.
“It’s really hard,” she confides.
“I had to talk about things even my mum didn’t know.”
While Jaquie came on board to help add some light-hearted moments to the show, their on-camera conversations became some of the most emotional in the two-part series. During the filming of the documentary, Jaquie lost a close friend and was struggling with the sudden loss.
“I was grieving hard – I still am – and it was hard to hold it together,” says Jaquie, holding back her tears.
“So when I talked to Sonia about what she was going through, I lost the plot. The thought of her struggling was too much to bear. You love your friends so much, you don’t want them to be hurting.”
Despite still feeling raw from the experience, Sonia says the process helped her gain a new understanding of her anxiety. She’s open to continuing her exploration of psychedelic therapy as one of many tools for mental wellness.
“I think psychedelic therapy is exciting, but it’s not a magic cure,” she reflects.
“You’ve got to have all the other things like sleep, food and connection in place as well.”
She also stresses the importance of safety when using psychedelics.
“We have to respect these substances,” she explains.
“There are risks. Having the right dosage and the proper support is important.”
Having witnessed Sonia’s journey first-hand, Jaquie says she remains deeply inspired by her friend’s courage and purpose.
“It was a privilege to witness her go through something so deeply vulnerable,” she enthuses.
“It’s so brave of her to put herself out there, but I think this is her mission, to share these things to help other people. I’m so excited for people to see the real Sonia.”
Mind Menders is streaming now on Neon and Sky Go.
