Photography: Emily Chalk.
This week, TVNZ newsreader Melissa Stokes steps into the biggest job in New Zealand television, taking over as the face of the country’s flagship 6pm news bulletin. On screen, she’s the ultimate professional – calm, composed and confident as she delivers the news to living rooms across the country. Off screen, though? She’s a total softie. Within minutes of sitting down with Woman’s Day at a café near her home on Auckland’s North Shore, the tears are flowing.
“I’m sorry,” she laughs, dabbing at her eyes.
“I’m a crier! I hate crying because once I start, I can’t stop.”
After more than 20 years with TVNZ and the past seven of them as the 1News weekend presenter, Melissa, 47, is thrilled to be stepping into broadcasting legend Simon Dallow’s shoes on the weekday bulletin. It’s a huge milestone for the former European correspondent and something she’s been working towards her entire career.
A life built on breaking news
“Ever since I was a young reporter, I just loved that cut and thrust of daily news,” says Melissa.
“It’s that thing of going to work each day and not knowing what might be on the cards. There’s an incredible camaraderie with live TV, being in a newsroom filled with talented people who care deeply about what we’re doing.”
But Melissa confesses her celebrations have been a little muted. There’s a sadness beneath the excitement given her mum Gill isn’t here to share it. She died in June 2023, aged 72, after a seven-year battle with lung cancer.
Bittersweet without mum
“Mum would have been so thrilled about me getting this job, so it’s felt very bittersweet,” admits Melissa, whose mother opted to die by euthanasia after her cancer spread to her brain.
In fact, she confesses, it was her dad Roger who encouraged her to do this interview because it would have made Gill proud. Settling in to chat, she notes, “I mentioned I’d like to get my feet under the desk first before I did any publicity, but Dad said, ‘Oh, come on, you have to do it for your mum!’ So here I am.”
Melissa has been through a lot in the past few years. She considers losing her mum the most significant event and has spoken about it in depth. But there’s also the everyday intensity that comes with raising her growing boys – Hugo, who turns 14 next week and has ADHD, and Freddie, 11 – as well as occasional bouts of anxiety.
Choosing honesty over perfection
Some people in the public eye might prefer to keep these challenges under wraps. But Melissa says she’s happy to share, especially if her honesty might help someone else.
“I’m not someone who wants or needs to present a perfectly curated view of my life,” she tells.
“I wouldn’t know how to talk without being open and honest. I don’t see the point.”
She’s adamant her life experiences make her a better journalist and she’s relieved the days of women of a certain age being overlooked for TV roles are gone, as “the older we get, the more we bring to
the table”, she explains.
Growing into the role
“The reality is, I couldn’t have done this at 30 because, really, I didn’t know anything about life at 30! All the things that I’ve dealt with add to the fabric of who I am when I’m sitting in the seat.”
When we meet, Melissa – married to TVNZ cameraman Dave Pierce – has just finished a te reo Māori class taught by broadcasting couple Stacey and Scotty Morrison.
She’s been learning for more than five years, initially to help her on-air pronunciation, but these sessions have become so much more.
A journey of cultural awakening
“I soon realised how ignorant I was about Māoridom and the culture in New Zealand, and I felt terrible about that,” she confesses.
“I really have loved learning about tikanga and te ao Māori, and I find it quite grounding now.”
But typically self-deprecating, she says she’s still not as fluent as she’d hoped and as someone who likes to be good at things, Melissa admits her te reo journey has been confronting.
Navigating anxiety & self-doubt
“Obviously, my command of English is OK, so then to be put back to a toddler level is hard,” she shares. “I think too big about it, you know? I overthink what I’m trying to say.”
“Thinking too big” has been a common theme in Melissa’s life. After the COVID lockdowns, she found herself struggling with anxiety and was prescribed medication for a year. Now, though, she deals with “that constant little voice in my head” mainly through exercise, but hormone replacement therapy, which she started a year ago, has also helped her mood.
Finding support through menopause
Prompted by Wendy Petrie, her TVNZ colleague, she sought help for perimenopause—and soon discovered her mood improved and her hip pain disappeared.
She recalls asking Dave if he’d noticed she’d become more pleasant to be around.
“His answer wasn’t what I was looking for!” she laughs.
Facing health fears head-on
On a serious note, however, Melissa says since her mum’s death, fears about her own mortality have become harder to quieten. This year alone, she’s had all the usual yearly tests, like mammograms and skin checks, plus a colonoscopy and also an MRI of her brain after she experienced double vision. All came back clear, but a persistent anxiety about her own health remains.
Living with the weight of family history
“There is a lot of cancer in my mum’s side of the family, so that weighs on me, and obviously seeing what Mum went through was awful. But the job probably doesn’t help as every day I’m reminded of the things that can go wrong!”
Work, however, is where she feels most in control. Melissa’s good at her job and after 24 years in TV journalism, she still loves the fast pace of daily news. But she also loves being a mum and she feels grateful her weekend presenting role allowed her to be present in their lives as her boys grew.
Adjusting to the new routine
The new weekday job means life will look a little different for the family, but Melissa is confident they’ll make it work.
“I keep reminding them we’ve had a good long run at me being at home for them,” she adds.
Cherishing the little moments
“But I know I’ll really miss it too. One of my favourite things is having all the boys in the car, listening to them chat, and learning all their silly words and phrases. They’re so funny. They always make me laugh.”
Talking about Hugo and Freddie gets the waterworks going again.
“I’m hopeless!” she insists, wiping away tears.
“But my happiest moments in life are with them. They’re the best.”
Hugo enjoys school, mountain biking and kayaking, while Freddie is a football fanatic who’s lobbying his mum to let him play rugby.
Freddie’s latest campaign
“He did his school speech on ‘why my mum should let me play rugby’, so watch this space. I might have to change my mind.”
Meanwhile, as we barrel towards the summer holidays, Melissa’s excited to have a month off. Christmas will be spent with family and friends at Mount Maunganui, and she can’t wait to walk up the maunga each morning, then join her boys paddleboarding and surfing. Since losing her mum, she’s found herself moving away from the festive traditions of her childhood.
“Grief has taken some of the joy out of Christmas, so we decided last year to do things differently, which really helped. I’m even thinking we might do takeaways for lunch this year, but I’m not sure how everyone else will feel about pizza on Christmas Day!”
Making the most of summer
Later in January, Melissa, Dave and the boys will head north for a week at a bach with good friends. She’s looking forward to all the things that make a classic Kiwi summer holiday – beach cricket, barbecues, boating, swimming in the sea and simply hanging out with the people she loves.
“It’s that wonderful thing of having everything to do and nothing to do. I can’t wait.”
A purpose-driven career
Then it’ll be full steam ahead into 2026 as Melissa settles into her new role.
“It’s never been more important that New Zealanders can access good, fair, balanced journalism and we’re all there because we care about getting information out to the public. Seriously, nothing beats being in the newsroom – that sense of purpose. It’s a privilege to be sharing people’s highest highs and lowest lows. I’m lucky I get to do what I love.”
