Andi Crown
Almost 13 years on since she last stepped foot in a theatre, Fern Sutherland is back treading the boards and drawing on her experience of falling in love to do it. The Brokenwood Mysteries actress now splits her time between New Zealand and Thailand, where she’s travelled for the past four years to pursue her passion for Muay Thai kickboxing.
While training in Phuket, she met her partner Duang, a kickboxing trainer. With the pair initially unable to speak the same language, their relationship blossomed thanks to a translation app and learning to read each other’s cues.
“As an actor, language is my currency, so that’s how I communicate,” Fern, 38, tells Woman’s Day.
“But what I realised with my partner is that we didn’t have that as a foundation. What it forced us to do was to be really present physically because when we first met, we were communicating through Google Translate. That was very unsatisfying to me in a lot of ways, but it meant we became aware of each other’s energies.”
“In the process, I realised how much I misrepresented myself with language. I think everyone does, especially in relationships, because we hide behind it or we sugarcoat things and don’t actually say what we mean. But with my boyfriend, I couldn’t do that, so I had to distil what I really wanted to say, which meant I had to figure out how I was actually feeling.”
Connected beyond words
This beautiful experience has proved to Fern that having a true connection with another person transcends words – a sentiment she’s taking into her role in the new play Thirty-Six, which opens at Wellington’s Circa Theatre next month.
In the comedic show, her character Jenny meets love interest David on a Tinder date. While she’s looking for a quick, hot hook-up, he’s keen to establish a genuine bond, which he embarks on by asking her the famous 36 questions that, according to psychology research, will lead to love. What unfolds is a night of daring and divulging.
Opposites, same desire
“It’s about two people speaking at cross-purposes, but they want the same thing – connection,” explains Fern.
“How they go about getting that is quite different. This play celebrates the fact that the human experience is messy, chaotic, ironic, hilarious and interesting. Regardless of who you are – single or in
a relationship – anyone could get something out of it.”
A bold break from Kristin
Jenny is a far cry from Fern’s much-loved, straight-laced Brokenwood Mysteries character Kristin Sims.
“Kristin is awesome,” Fern says.
“She’s successful and gets to where she wants to be through her intellect. I’m proud to be in that show and play her, but it’s nice to become a character that’s very removed from Kristin. Jenny is a little bit less self-assured in lots of ways, but also very sure of her sexuality. It’s really important to her and she’s going to have a good time regardless. “It’s such a different character that sometimes I think, ‘I wonder how people who are used to seeing me as a conscientious small-town cop are going to feel about this?’ It’s a departure from Kristin, which is really exciting.”
Opening the theatre doors for the first time this month to begin rehearsals brought back a rush of memories from her time at Unitec, where she graduated in 2008.
Leaning into fear
Confesses Fern, “I’ve been lucky enough to have TV and some film jobs, and that’s quite a different thing, so to go back to my grassroots has been a bit like a homecoming – a terrifying one. “But if you’re feeling uncomfortable about something, chances are it’s a good thing to do because you’re going to learn something, so I’m trying to lean into that feeling of being challenged.”
Fern has learnt to love getting outside of her comfort zone. It was during a difficult time when she was grappling with the deaths of two friends and the end of a long-term relationship that she travelled to Thailand – and began to learn Muay Thai.
Each year, as soon as filming wrapped on Brokenwood, she would eagerly return to the Southeast Asian kickboxing mecca to immerse herself in the culture and continue her practice. Last year, she stepped into the ring in Phuket and won her first-ever fight.
Mind, body & spirit
“It was nice to get my body ready to do this very specific thing, to celebrate what it can do and show what I’m capable of,” enthuses Fern.
“That involved eating right and being fit, but it also meant dealing with my emotions and getting myself ready psychologically.”
To help her prep for the big event, Duang taught her the art of wai kru, a sacred pre-fight dance and prayer ceremony that kickboxers do in front of the spectators to honour their mentors, ancestors and trainers, before fronting up to their opponent. Duang was also ringside for her fight.
Fully present in the moment
“It was just so cool to be in that situation, feel grateful for it and have the people I really love in my corner, cheering me on,” recalls Fern.
“Quite often when I’m in stressful situations, I disassociate, but in this instance, I was present. Even though I thought it was going to be one of the hardest moments of my life, it was one of the most enjoyable, fun and triumphant.”
Love in a new language
After falling for Duang, who’s now living with her in Auckland, the actress also decided to start learning the Thai language.
“I wasn’t immediately good at it,” admits Fern.
“I’ve always had an ear for Latin-based languages, but Asian languages are completely different, so it’s been a bit of an ego death for me to try to learn Thai. I find it really difficult.”
However, what she lacks in skill, she makes up for in enthusiasm.
Learning to speak from the heart
“If you want to understand a culture, you have to try to understand the language and it’s been a really beautiful thing for me,” she shares.
“With Asian languages, the way they express themselves is quite emotional. For example, in Thai, jai means heart, so if you’re jai dee, you’re kind-hearted. But if you’re jai dam, it literally translates to ‘black heart’ – you’re cold and uncaring. They don’t explain emotions; they just express it in terms of the state of a person’s heart.”
A heart in the right place
Thankfully for Fern, her heart is in the best place it’s been in many years. With plans to stay in Aotearoa for the rest of the year to film Brokenwood, she has her sights firmly set on returning to Thailand at the end of 2026.
“I’m a really lucky person because I have this amazing job, I love the people I work with, and I really can’t fault Brokenwood,” she enthuses.
“I also get to do this play with some friends of mine, then I get to go back to Thailand to experience this other facet of myself. I feel very grateful.”
Thirty-Six opens Saturday 7 March at Wellington’s Circa Theatre. For tickets, visit circa.co.nz.
