He’s the much-loved star of the TV series Casketeers, but today Francis Tipene is almost drowning in love from his wife Kaiora because the father-of-five has just pulled off the most romantic event of their lives. Somehow, he managed to get his wife to Fiji and surprise her with a second wedding.
“I’d take planning a funeral over a wedding any day,” says Francis, 38. “Oh, man!”
The much-relieved husband may have just had a stressful few days, but he really looks quite happy about it. In fact, he looks very much like the cat that got the cream.
“It was so beautiful,” says Kaiora, 39. “I got to walk down the aisle, which I didn’t get to do at our first wedding.”
The loved-up couple have been together for 18 years, which is when they became boyfriend and girlfriend, and their first wedding 17 years ago was at a registry office in Kaitaia.
“We didn’t have any rings,” recalls Francis. “So a kuia [female elder] who was there took her ring off and gave it to us to put on my wife’s finger as a symbol. It was such a beautiful thing to do and I remember saying to Kaiora, ‘One day I’ll give you a ring.'”
The couple had a small reception at the local Chinese takeaway and there was no honeymoon as they both needed to get back to work.
The idea for a second wedding to renew their vows was something the couple had planned last year to have in Auckland and had got so far with the planning that Kaiora had a wedding dress made for the occasion. But when a Covid lockdown got in the way, they put it on hold.
Then Francis had the idea to add something extra to their trip to Fiji, which had been planned for a long time.
“We were coming to Fiji with the Casketeers crew to look at the way they do funerals in Fiji, so I just added the wedding onto it to make it worthwhile,” he explains.
“I thought it’d be quite easy and just a matter of ringing a few people we knew in Fiji, but as it got closer, it got more and more difficult.
“I just thought, ‘It’s Fiji, we’ll do it on the beach, we’ll get a band, we’ll have some food. How hard could that be?’ Kaiora loves Fiji. We love Fiji. The kids love it. Let’s do it there!”
But keeping a secret from Kaiora was harder than Francis thought because she’s very good at reading his moods.
“I knew something was up because he just wasn’t himself,” tells Kaiora. “He would be still and frozen on certain parts of our trip to Fiji. I kept saying, ‘What’s going on? We’re in Fiji – just relax!’
“When I look back now, I realise he wasn’t himself, but at the time I thought maybe the film crew was asking too much of him or maybe the kids wanted to do too much. I really should have known something was up when we arrived because I ordered him his favourite tropical drink and he wouldn’t drink it.”
Meanwhile, Francis was trying to put all the finishing touches to the big day with the help of a friend in Fiji.
“In the end, I just said to her, ‘You know Kaiora well, you decide.’ I can decide on flowers for funerals, but I had no idea what to do for a wedding.”
The nuptials were to take place on the Saturday, but by the time they got to Friday, Francis decided he couldn’t keep the secret any longer from Kaiora. Things were getting tense.
“I was trying to get her to organise a nice dress for Saturday,” he says. “I told her we were doing a photo shoot with the kids. She started getting angry because I was telling her she needed something nicer to wear. I’d thought of picking up the wedding dress she’d had made last year, but it was a winter style and I knew she’d swelter in it.”
Kaiora says she’d tried to find a lovely maxi dress in Auckland for the “photoshoot”, but everything in shops was still winter stock, so she had no luck.
“I thought my clothes were good enough for photos, but then Francis starts going on about finding something really nice and I got a bit upset about that.”
That’s when Francis decided to let the cat out of the bag and got the family involved.
He explains, “Her sister Ngawaiata Stratton had flown over with our niece, who is named Kaiora as well. So I asked her to tell her. I was so stressed, I just couldn’t do it myself.”
The family was in the resort restaurant having a meal when Kaiora spotted a little girl run into the restaurant.
“I thought, ‘That looks like my niece’, but then I thought I was just having a vision or something. And then she called out ‘Aunty Kaiora’, and I leapt out of my chair and went running to her.”
Her sister explained to her that the reason they were all there was to celebrate their wedding to renew their vows.
“I was so shocked and cried,” admits Kaiora. “Then I immediately felt sorry for Francis for all the stress he’d been going through and the hard time I’d given him.”
The next morning, Kaiora and Ngawaiata headed into town to find a wedding dress, which was quite stressful. “In the end, I just thought to myself, ‘Find something, put it on and make it work.'”
But having her sister there meant the world to Kaiora.
“She is my go-to. She’s someone who I can relate to, and we are able to reflect with each other and pretty much do anything and everything with each other.”
On the day, Kaiora was supposed to get a ride to the beach ceremony in a golf cart by herself.
“But my son Moronai was a bit worried about me and asked if he could come too. So I said, ‘Hop on with me,’ and then my sister was running behind, so I got her on as well,” she laughs.
Then when it came time to walk down the aisle, Kaiora turned to Moronai, saying, “Come with Mummy. Hold my hand down the aisle.”
Moronai, 14, is the couple’s second son; their eldest son Nikora, 16, had stayed back in Auckland to work and study.
“It was too much time for him to take out, but he called us on the day,” says Francis.
Oldest son Nikora missed his parents’ celebration.
Their other sons Mikae, nine, Mihaka, seven, and Francis Jnr, three, were there with Moronai.
The happy couple with sons (from left) Francis Jnr, Mihaka, Moronai and Mikae.
On the big day, the whānau was joined by half of the local Fijian village and when Francis saw some other people standing nearby videoing the event, he persuaded them to come over and join in too.
“I thought, ‘Why not? More the merrier!'”
One of the special guests at their wedding was the daughter of Stan Neho, the longest-serving employee and co-founder of Tipene Funerals. Sadly, Stan died earlier this year, so Francis invited his daughter Jahnah. She is married to Asuelu Sitia (Foliki), who is also a long- term Tipene employee, and there couldn’t be a wedding without senior funeral director Fiona Tania Bakulich.
Stan was remembered on the couple’s special day.
Casketeers fans can look forward to seeing full coverage of the wedding on the next season of the show, and the Tipenes also took time out in Fiji to go to a local funeral and see how Fijian culture handles the death of a loved one.
“Sadly, someone in the village died while we were there. We knew her as she had been a cleaner when we stayed in Fiji before, so it was only right that we pay our respects,” says Francis.
“We went to the chief of the village to ask permission to film and it was really beautiful to be allowed to do that.”
The Tipenes with their Casketeers family Fiona Tania (left) and Fatafehi Tamale.
But for Francis, combining work for the TV series, planning a secret wedding while also supervising the building of a reception lounge at their funeral chapel back in New Zealand, this was no holiday.
When the Tipenes last talked to the Weekly, both of them felt that being the stars of a top-rating TV series, while also running a highly successful and rapidly expanding funeral business was taking them away from time with their children. But now things have changed
“We’ve made spending time with the kids a priority and we are now. It’s working,” insists Francis.
He knows that come Father’s Day, he will be with his five sons, being spoiled rotten, while staff takes care of the funerals.
“We’ve employed a number of new staff to cope with us having more time with the kids, but also our other employees can have more time off too. We have a lovely new roster going, which gives everyone some time off so they can come back refreshed. Everyone has benefitted.”
Adds Kaiora, “It’s so good. We spend every other weekend if not every weekend with our kids.”
So there will be more holidays with the kids, but perhaps no more weddings for a while.
“He’s the husband of the year,” smiles Kaiora. “He’s definitely the husband of eternity. We finally got to have our own time last night and I was a bit nervous because I wanted to tell him how grateful I am to have him. How do you articulate those words? So I just said it, and he was there with a hug and a kiss.”
Francis is grinning from ear to ear. “It works both ways,” he says.
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