Walking out onto the rugby field at the start of a new season is a big moment for any player, but none more so than Charmaine Smith. After coming back from being medically retired in 2020, the mum-of-one is making the most of her second chance.
“Every time I go to a training or I have to go for a run in the rain, I think, ‘This is so cool that I’m able to do this,’ because I know what it feels like to not have it,” tells the Black Fern. “My biggest goal is to show my daughter that she can be anything she wants to be. It’s okay to fail, as long as you’ve tried as hard as you can.”
At the start of 2020, Charmaine was experiencing some minor lower back pain. She didn’t think it was anything major, but went to her doctor to get a scan just in case. By chance, they decided to scan her whole spine and while there was nothing wrong with her lower back, a bulging disc in her neck had doctors very concerned.
When the nation was plunged into level four lockdown, Charmaine spent the next few months in limbo, waiting to get an appointment with a specialist to find out if her rugby career was over.
In June, she finally had the tests she needed and received the news she dreaded to hear – the bulging disk was pressing on her spinal cord and there was no surgical option to fix it. Just three years after she had helped the Black Ferns to World Cup victory, she was forced to retire.
Bringing home victory against the US during the 2017 Rugby World Cup.
“It hurt so much for so long,” recalls Charmaine, who made her Black Ferns debut in 2015. “I gave away most of my rugby things and the stuff I kept was packed up into a box. I reached the pinnacle and then all of a sudden it was gone.”
The rugby champion is also a sergeant in the New Zealand Police, and she says going back to work and witnessing first-hand how many people were struggling during the pandemic kept her from falling down a dark hole.
“It gave me a lot of perspective about what’s important in life. It was difficult, but it showed me that although what I was going through was hard, there are people that are going through worse.”
The popular sergeant loves life on the beat.
The pain of leaving the sport was also eased when almost a year later, Charmaine and her partner of five years Tamati Thompson, both 32, found out they were expecting their first child.
“I was so excited,” she tells. “I don’t have the words to describe how I felt. I can’t imagine our lives without her.”
Though she was delighted to start her next chapter as a mum, there was a small part of Charmaine that never gave up hope that she would again don the black jersey.
“I like to say my baby healed me,” says Charmaine, with partner Tamati.
She kept in touch with her specialists and continued getting scans that showed her bulging disc had shrunk, but still not enough to return to her beloved sport.
Eight days after she welcomed Amīria in October 2021, she went for another scan with her mum and baby in tow, never imagining her life was about to change again.
“I didn’t have high hopes, but I had to triple-check. I was expecting there to be no change or that there was a surgery option. I wasn’t expecting to walk out of there and be cleared to play. I like to say my baby healed me.”
If she hadn’t just given birth, Charmaine would have had her boots on that afternoon ready to get back on the field! The only thing that gave her pause was her family’s concern.
“I get so emotional when I think about it,” she shares through tears. “When we went through it the first time, I remember the worry on their faces. I want them to feel joy when they watch me play. I didn’t want them to worry that something was going to happen to me.”
With her family behind her, Charmaine is raring to go as part of the Waitomo Chiefs Manawa squad for the 2023 Super Rugby Aupiki season.
Charmaine, who lives in Whangārei, makes the journey to Hamilton every week with Amīria for training. While balancing rugby and parenthood with her police work is a lot, she credits the support of the Chiefs management – who have hired a full-time nanny to support the many mothers on the team – and her partner Tamati for making it possible.
“I wouldn’t be able to do what I do without him. Working on the front line is hard enough with a baby, let alone playing rugby as well. I hit the jackpot with him.”
Luckily, Amīria is a social baby and has charmed everyone at camp Chiefs.
“She gets along with everyone and she’s pretty independent,” Charmaine laughs. “It’s pretty cool to have a little girl who knows What she wants.”
