The death of her obese friend Sharon Bishop has made Miranda Gray Taufa determined to slim down from a dangerous 229kg. If the 41-year-old from Gisborne doesn’t lose weight, she could die.
Feeling my chest tighten, I sleepily felt around in the dark for my asthma pump. “I’m sure I had it next to me,” I thought. As my breathing got sharper, I turned on the light. “Grace!” I yelled out to my 17-year-old daughter. “Where is my pump?”
“Roll over, oum. You’re probably lying on it,” she called back. I heaved myself over – not an easy move at 229kg. Reaching across my body I felt my inhaler wedged between two layers of fat in my armpit and pulled it out.
That’s not the first time I’ve lost something in my body folds. The television remote control often goes missing and is usually found stuck under my stomach flap and the house key was lost for hours one day until I found it in my bra.
once, I thought an insect was biting me but when we lifted a roll of fat we found tweezers digging into my skin.
I haven’t always been this size and I wasn’t a chubby child. I had my first baby in 1986 when I was 21 and gave up my job helping at the hospital to become a stay-at-home mum.
oy partner was a great provider – the fridge was always full, takeaways were our favourite and I was spoiled with chocolates all the time. Life was good, I was happy – and the weight piled on.
It only took four years to spiral out of control and I became obese. I was always aware of obesity and its dangers but I never thought it would happen to me.
Now I live my life with constant joint pain because of the weight on my body and I know it’s taking a serious toll on my organs. I worry about dying from obesity like my friend Sharon Bishop did and leaving my children behind.
I rely on my 20-year-old daughter Christine for help. She comes to my house every day to wash and bathe me. I can barely even go to the toilet alone. I hate having to rely on her – she needs to live her own life – but at the moment, I don’t have a choice.
Not long ago, I fell in the shower and it took seven people to lift me back up. I hate living the way I am. I want to be healthy and for my children to be free of caring for me. I weigh more than three times what I should and have about 170kg to lose to be the proper weight for my height. But any amount fat I can lose will be good for me.
I first made the decision to change my life in 1997. I was fed up with being fat and knew my whole life had to change because I could feel the effects on my health and happiness. I divorced my husband and made a fresh start.
For the past three years, TV3 has been following me around making a documentary about my life. The first series focused on the weight-loss journey of myself and Sharon but, sadly, she passed away in December.
Bedridden for the past two years, she lost her battle against obesity at the age of 52. I miss her companionship and support. Sharon was the one person who knew what I was going through and now she is gone. She had so much to offer this world and now she will never get that chance.
What makes matters worse is that Sharon had found love on the internet and was due to marry on Christmas Day – the same week she died. When she became ill, she called her fiancé in South Africa and asked him to wait a while before he came to New Zealand for their wedding. But she never got better.
I was worried my grief would set me back in my determination to slim down. I thought I might use food to ease my pain. But instead, losing Sharon has made me more determined than ever to win my battle.
I get weighed every week on huge industrial scales at the hospital and I dread it every time. But I have lost 20kg so far.
I have other things to look forward to too. My heavy, hanging stomach flap means I can’t walk properly, so I have an operation booked in June to have part of it removed. But I have to lose another 20kg or the surgery will be too dangerous.
Exercise is hard for me because my stomach hits my knees when I walk. So I rely on diet alone to shift the weight, although I swim every week.
I love singing so I busk to earn the fee to get into the pool. A lot of people have seen the first TV3 documentary and support me. It brings a tear to my eye when they stop me in the street to say they are behind me in my battle.
Not everyone is so understanding though. Sometimes kids point and laugh – but it doesn’t bother me too much.
I visit local schools to talk about obesity because I want our habits to change. Some people have criticised me because I don’t have a teaching qualification but I have lived with obesity and I know what I’m talking about so I don’t let them put me off. I’ve got a lot to offer and I want to help. As told to Jonica Bray Photography by Gray Clapham
