Every morning when Erna and Karl Van Der Wat wake up, they turn and ask each other the same question: “Is every pain in its place?” It’s a well-worn shtick.
“If there’s no new pain that’s popped up, then we’re fine!” laughs the Kiwi husband-and-wife team who were awarded winners of the World of Wearable Art (WOW) Metallic Section for their entry Armour of Pain, also earning the Supreme WOW Runner-up overall.
After 20 years of being finalists, it’s the couple’s most personal creation yet. Armour of Pain was inspired by Erna’s journey with chronic pain and its transformation from “tormentor to mentor” in her life.
At four years old, Erna learned she had Hirschsprung’s disease, a congenital condition where missing nerve cells in part of the large intestine (colon) cause severe bowel blockages.
“I had surgery to remove part of my colon, but luckily I didn’t need a stoma,” shares Erna, 56, chatting to Woman’s Weekly from the pair’s South Auckland home in Karaka.
“The after-effects of it snowballed and I was left with a lot of lesions and went through a lot of surgeries. I grew up and simply got used to living with pain. I suppose I took it in my stride, and thought ‘This is how life is,’ and got on with it.”
A life shaped by pain
When Erna turned 30, the sad realisation hit that she and Karl wouldn’t be able to have children, due to all her lesions.
“That was definitely a grieving process for us. And another side effect was then me going into early menopause, followed by early osteopenia and osteoporosis.
“The osteopenia resulted in a jaw break and multiple surgeries for that, which have ended in TMJ disorder [pain and dysfunction in the joint and muscles that control jaw movement]. “It’s one of my most painful points really and has hugely impacted my life,” Erna says.
“It’s caused trauma. But in my mid-forties, I decided I’m not going to let my pain define me or torment me. “And I get embarrassed even talking about it because I don’t want to sound like ‘woe is me’. Hopefully, sharing my journey helps people with chronic pain know that they’re not alone.”
Bubbly and upbeat, Erna has chosen to tackle her physical challenges with a positive attitude, while distracting herself with creative projects. When she and Karl, 60, were thinking about what to invent for this year’s WOW, she was reminded of the adage “write what you know”.
Erna says, “One morning, it was so sore to get out of bed, I said to Karl, ‘Maybe we should create something that we truly know about.’ “So we started by creating the arrows of different lengths and different sizes. I put on the bodice and told him, ‘I’m going to point the arrows to where I feel the pain most. “The funny thing is, he goes, ‘Okay, you have to stop now because we have no more arrows left!’ I hadn’t even got to the arms, knees or feet!”
A love story that began young
Originally from South Africa, the artsy pair met and fell in love as teenagers at Potchefstroom University.
“We never left each other’s side after that and were just meant to be,” she says.
Karl ran an ostrich farm and Erna was a qualified dietitian before they immigrated to New Zealand in the late ’90s.
Now property developers, they jokingly refer to collaborating on WOW projects as their “couple’s therapy”, counterbalancing the stress of running a business in today’s challenging climate.
Erna had always dreamed of making theatre costumes. When she saw a clip from WOW while watching TVNZ’s Good Morning in 2006, she told Karl, “I have to enter.”
More than just an award
Three years later, they decided to do so together. Erna is the “dreamer” while Karl is the “creator”, drawing on his construction experience to ensure their ideas take form.
“I wouldn’t call us artists or designers,” she reflects.
“We just like to tinker. It takes my mind off the pain. “The neighbours all know when we’re busy with WOW – the front gate closes and the lights are on throughout the night, then they start delivering us feijoas or wine.”
After receiving their Supreme award recently, a quiet moment on stage reiterated to Erna why they take part.
“A woman in the audience came and hugged me for a few seconds, and just started to sob because our garment had made her feel seen. It was the most touching moment. I said to Karl, ‘This is why we do it – this is our reward.’ “All I wanted to show is that no one can escape pain. Every single one of us lives with chronic pain, whether it is physical, mental, emotional or spiritual.”
