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Friends or more?

Dear Wendyl, I returned from Australia four years ago and mended myself back together after my relationship didn’t work out.

Dear Wendyl,

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I returned from Australia four years ago and mended myself back together after my relationship didn’t work out. I caught up with family and friends, and kept myself busy so the pain could go away. Then I met a guy, who I thought was an idiot to start with, and now I’m not sure what our relationship status is.

We are constantly hot and cold. Our communication consisted of texting and phone calls and drinking alcohol. There wasn’t anything too sexual, just lots of kissing and cuddling with all hands above the belt. Then it died down, but every now and then he’ll text me and everything I feel for him comes flooding back and makes me crazy. Please help!

Geraldine, by email

Dear Geraldine,

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Let me take you back to your first impression of this guy: an “idiot”, to quote you. I’m very big on first impressions and I think in this instance you got it right. I know you don’t want to hear this but you’re reading too much into this relationship. It’s not sexual and it exists on texting and drinking. That’s a friendship.

So treat it as that and try not to imagine that there is anything more going on, because there isn’t. If you manage to do this you might find that just being friends, or not, is fine by you.

Send your questions to [email protected] or write to Agony Aunt, NZWW, PO Box 90119, Victoria St West, Auckland 1142

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