Dear Wendyl,
I’m in my early thirties, very fun-loving and social, and married to the sweetest man you could find. But a while ago I spent a weekend away with some friends and something terrible happened.
I slept with one of my girlfriends, which at the time seemed quite natural, as we were all a bit drunk and having a great time. But when I got home I felt terrible, even though I had slept with a woman, so I didn’t technically cheat on him. Do you think I need to tell my husband?
Guilty, AucklandDear Guilty,
Technically you didn’t cheat on him? What technicality is that – the one where it’s okay for you to steal if the person is rich? Come on, you’re making excuses. Sex with another person, either the same or opposite sex, is an intimate relationship and qualifies as cheating if you’re committed to a monogamous relationship. So yes, you do need to tell your husband if you want to respect and honour the vows you made.
Send your questions to [email protected] or write to Agony Aunt, NZWW, PO Box 90119, Victoria St West, Auckland 1142