Relationships

Agony aunt: One and only

Sitting around waiting for The one or or Right is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of a woman doing. Because the reality is that The one and or Right simply don't exist

Dear Wendyl,

I’m in my early thirties and I’ve been with my current boyfriend for two years. My problem is that I want get married and have children soon as my biological clock is ticking away, but I’m not 100% sure he’s The one.

What if I end up with him and then my real or Right comes along and I’ve made the wrong decision? oy boyfriend is really keen to move forward but I’m scared that if I marry him and have his children, I’ll be making a big mistake.

Please help me sort myself out!

Rachel, email

Dear Rachel,

You’re either simply having pre-commitment nerves or you just aren’t in love – it’s hard for me to tell from your letter. But you do need to realise there is no such thing as The one. This guy only exists in romantic comedies – not in real life – so dispense with that fantasy right now.

Does your boyfriend satisfy you on about 70% to 80% of the things that matter to you, like his values, character and how he treats others? Do you have passion? Is there chemistry between you? If there are just a few things holding you back, then I say get over yourself and put some effort into creating a long-term relationship.

Wendyl

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