If you’ve been watching FBoy Island, you’ll be familiar with Will Inwood-Reardon. The 23-year-old from Mount Maunganui is a good-looking, charismatic guy, whose eccentric style and wit make him a catch for the ladies – and a threat to the other blokes on the reality series.
So it’s surprising to learn that Will has been struggling with mental illness for almost two years now and it’s a condition that’s rarely talked about among men – body dysmorphic disorder (BDD).
“Looking back, I suffered with body image for a long time,” Will confesses to Woman’s Day. “I was quite large as a kid and, going into high school, I just stopped eating. I didn’t know what eating disorders were back then. I didn’t know that hating yourself to the point where you stop eating was a problem.”
BDD is an illness that centres around obsession with perceived physical flaws, so much so that sufferers avoid social situations and become preoccupied with changing their appearance.
“Eventually, I got pretty skinny and I was happy with that, but then I started eating again and started getting larger,” says Will. “My body dysmorphia kicked in about two years ago. I crash-dieted with keto and went to the gym a lot. I started to look really good. I was lean and I had a lot of muscle, and that actually just fuelled my hatred more, to the point where my mind collapsed on itself.”
Jan 2020, just before Will embarked on another gruelling regimen.
It was at the gym where a friend of Will’s pointed out he might have a problem with body image and suggested he stop following his diet plan.
“I had to fall back on my friends,” he recalls. “I couldn’t take the load myself. I’m glad I had that support because I don’t know how much more I could have taken. I hated the way I looked so much. It’s gross to look back on how harsh I was on myself.”
At his mate’s suggestion, Will made a doctor’s appointment and came away with reading material about different disorders. He and the GP concluded Will had a body image problem stemming from the childhood bullying he received due to his size.
Of the time of his diagnosis, Will says, “I was my absolute best physically. I was the leanest I’d ever been and I still wasn’t happy. That’s when I knew the problem existed. Surrounding myself with the right people was important.”
Will believes he might not have come out the other side if he didn’t have a network of “great and supportive friends” to confide in, something he suspects many men are lacking.
“Women are more naturally attuned with their emotions and being open about things. They can talk about that stuff. Guys have the whole ‘toughen up, take a cement pill, march on’ attitude.”
While BDD is more prevalent in women, recent studies show there’s been a surge in cases in young men over the past 10 years. Will says, “There are a lot of guys who are hanging on by a thread and all they need is someone to say, ‘How are you? Do you want to talk about how you feel?’ But people aren’t asking that as they’re so used to being shut down by men when they try to help.”
Despite working hard on self-acceptance since his diagnosis, Will still struggles with body image and admits he still has to learn not to care what others think. “I still can’t help passing by a mirror and thinking, ‘Do I look like that to everyone else?’ I have to remember that no one’s ever made a comment on my body in the past few years, but here I am hating on myself.”
Will – a ventilation technician, part-time actor and model – says that the “high school dynamics” of FBoy Island have helped him to acknowledge the progress he’s made.
The life of the party on FBoy Island.
“It was a massive milestone knowing I didn’t break from the pressure,” he explains. “Some of the others weren’t used to guys painting their nails, wearing feminine clothing and just being comfortable in their own skin,” shares Will. “But that didn’t upset me like it used to. That was how I knew toxic masculinity no longer infiltrates my life.”
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