Two strangers, a wedding and thousands of Kiwis watching the ceremony on live breakfast TV. It doesn’t sound like a recipe for lasting love, but a decade, two kids and an honest marriage memoir later. Sadé and Aaron Schuurman are proof that the wildest beginnings can lead to the strongest bonds.
A decade of love
In September, the couple will celebrate 10 years together after being legally wed within minutes of meeting on radio station The Edge’s Two Strangers And A Wedding competition. Despite the cameras rolling, producers hovering and the pressure of a live broadcast. Sadé remembers the stress melting away as soon as she saw Aaron.
“I walked down the aisle, looked into Aaron’s piercing and kind grey eyes, and it was love at first sight!” she smiles.
“Gorgeous” was Aaron’s impression of Sadé. Grinning, he adds, “We had interacted on radio a few times before finally meeting in person. I already loved what I knew about her.”
Life beyond the spotlight
Now raising their two boys, Lincoln, six, and Ashton, four, on the Gold Coast. The Schuurmans have built a life that’s far from conventional, but no less committed. They admit it hasn’t been plain sailing, tackling infidelity (which Sadé candidly addressed in her 2017 memoir So I Married A Stranger), postnatal depression, long-distance moves and the challenges of Aaron’s job, which sees him regularly travelling.
“There’s been a lot to unpack,” says Zimbabwe-born Sadé.
“It’s been eventful! We’ve been able to manage hard things together because we share old-fashioned values and have stayed committed to make our marriage work.” Aaron, 42, agrees it’s taken time to overcome their challenges and that becoming parents has changed them.
“Sadé and I have been on a journey together,” he admits.
“There’s been lots of travelling and making the most of life, but having the kids is the best part. I love our wee dudes so much.”
A leap of faith
Both agree they were different people when they signed up for the competition. Sadé was 27 and feeling the pressure of being an unmarried woman in her mixed-race culture. She saw The Edge’s casting call when she was a couple of drinks down on a flight and applied on a whim.
Chosen from 300 applicants a few weeks later, she found herself walking down the aisle to her then-32-year-old salesman groom, whose sister and cousin put him forward for a laugh, Aaron says.
“Once I got picked as the guy, I thought, ‘Why not? Things happen for a reason.’”
On their wedding night, Sadé asked Aaron to describe his dream job and when he said “saturation diver”, she was immediately supportive, despite it being one of the world’s most dangerous jobs.
Aaron now travels to locations around the world to carry out deep-sea work at extreme depths, such as tunnelling, building and even recovering shipwrecks.
Strength through support
“I’m lucky to have Sadé,” he muses.
“My job is exciting, but it’s hard working away from family. Without her, I’m not sure I would have got to where I am today.”
When he’s at work and not under the sea, Aaron spends most of his time in a hyperbaric chamber, so communication with family is critical.
“Sadé’s good at daily phone and video calls with the boys, as well as sending me photos,” he says. “It’s a lifeline for me.”
Because Sadé’s father used to travel for work when she was growing up, her adjustment to having a fly-in-fly-out husband has been much easier.
“I can’t imagine it any other way,” she says.
“I’m not sure we’d have a perfect marriage if Aaron was here 24/7.”
Celebrating 10 years together
When they are together, the couple take the time to invest in their relationship.
“We try to have one date night when he is home, even if it’s a bottle of Champagne and a cheeseboard after the boys are in bed,” Sadé tells.
Earlier this year, she launched her own dream business, an online high-end ethical diamond company called Diamonds by Sadé. It draws on her father’s legacy in the gem trade.
“In my culture, women wear a lot of jewellery,” she explains.
“I grew up surrounded by it, learning about stones, gems and metals from my father. My goal is to make exquisite and responsibly sourced diamonds accessible to everyone.”
As they prepare to return to New Zealand for a 10th anniversary vow renewal ceremony, Sadé believes their success is down to commitment, dedication and sometimes hard work.
“You can’t be in love every single day,” she says.
“But you can always appreciate and understand each other.”
