Pictures: Natasha McAllister, Robert Trathen, Valo Photography.
When acting supercouple Acushla-Tara Kupe and Paul Waggott married on 15 October 2023, they were blissfully unaware of how significant that date would turn out to be for another reason.
As their first wedding anniversary approached, elation over the birth of her beautiful nephew Mohi turned to anguish as Acushla-Tara received a call that the wee bub was fighting for his life in Starship Children’s Hospital.
The star of The Gone – who was appearing in a play in Christchurch at the time – immediately cancelled her theatre shows with full support of the theatre team.
She flew up to Auckland so she could support sister Melissa and her husband Ryan Simchowitz, and meet their firstborn Mohi, who sadly passed away at four days old.
“Millie had a very healthy pregnancy, but a string of random and unpredictable things happened around the time of his birth,” shares Acushla-Tara. “And if one of those things hadn’t happened, Mohi might still be here.
“He was adorable. He had chubby little arms and legs. I was lucky enough to hold his hand, tell him his pepeha [connection to the land and people] and sing to him before he went to be with his tūpuna [ancestors].
“It’s a journey no parent should have to take – just the worst. It’s been incredibly hard on the whole family and I think we’ll be still going through it for a very long time.”
Acushla-Tara, who’s of Ngāti Maniapoto descent, also felt honoured to live with her sister and brother-in-law for several weeks in Wellington as they grieved and got to talk about their precious pe¯pi.
Understandably, the whole experience has given the 34-year-old a new perspective.
“It’s changed how I behave around someone who’s pregnant,” she reflects. “To not assume things or fill silences with toxic positivity. Just listening and finding out what their experience is before I make a comment or make any assumptions.
“And as with any loss, it gives you a perspective on what’s important in life. When my sister Marika passed in 2021, it made me reprioritise everything and go, ‘What is actually important?’ I learnt to forget about the little things that can really grind and upset you on a daily basis.”
To honour Mohi and the “outstanding” medical care he received, his whānau is raising money for Starship in his name.
Next month, they’re taking on the fitness challenge Kilometres for Kids to help keep the Starship Air Ambulance flying, which will save the lives of sick and injured children. It’s New Zealand’s only flying Paediatric Intensive Care Unit and a full crew can be in the air in minutes.
“We’ve started a page called Moving for Mohi and we’re trying to raise a dollar for every minute he was with us,” explains Acushla-Tara, who has committed to running 85km during March.
“The Starship team and the way they looked after Mohi were absolutely unbelievable. He had a lot of tubes and they were so gentle with him, but it was also the way they looked after us. They let us stay an extra night with him after he passed.”
Days later, Acushla-Tara discovered that her wedding anniversary was in fact on Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Every year in New Zealand, more than 600 babies die between 20 weeks gestation and 12 months of age.
“So we’ll never forget it,” she says. “We still have our Guinness-flavoured wedding cake in the freezer that we meant to eat on our first anniversary. It’s just waiting for us to defrost it at some point. But our 11-year dating anniversary is coming up, so we can eat it then.”
Chatting to Woman’s Day from their new apartment on Auckland’s city fringe, Shortland Street star Paul, 36, reckons his talented wife has only lived there 40% of the past six months.
While he was ensconced in fictional Ferndale, playing bumbling pharmacist Thaddeus Fleiss, Acushla-Tara was in Te Aroha filming the second season of The Gone, which premieres at 8.30pm Tuesday on TVNZ 1.
Now an executive producer of the popular drama series, as well as starring as detective sergeant Diana Huia, she also spent a week in Ireland to watch the post-production process.
“I’m very proud of this season of The Gone,” she enthuses. “I’m really excited for the audience to see where it goes. In Ireland, where it has just screened, there’s a general vibe of it outshining season one.
“It was such a joy developing Diana’s character to see where she goes in her personal life. I reckon some viewers will go, ‘I flippin’ told you – I knew it!’ and others will be like, ‘What? I didn’t see that coming!’”
However, because The Gone has been off Kiwi screens for a while, Acushla-Tara admits she’s been enjoying some anonymity again. It’s now British-born Paul who Shorty fans regularly stop in the street.
He recalls “While we were in Te Aroha, some kids scootered past and shouted, ‘You’re Thaddeus! What are you doing here?!’ I explained I was just visiting my wife. So the kids asked if they could get a photo.
“I took the photo for them,” points out Acushla-Tara. “And then they went home and told their mum, who happened to be an extra on The Gone. She asked her son, ‘Was his wife there?’ and when they replied yes, the mum said, ‘Well, why didn’t you get a photo of her?’ We had a laugh about it the next week on set.”
Paul’s theory is that his wife often doesn’t get recognised because the characters she is best known for – including Sienna on Under The Vines, Bonnie Kawiti on Shorty and, of course, Diana – are so serious, moody and hold a grudge, whereas the bubbly actress is anything but in real life.
“It always cracks me up when people recognise me as Thaddeus, but there’s no recognition or even eye contact for Cush,” he says. “And I want to say, ‘But she’s amazing too!’ while also being a human shield because she’s happy to avoid the attention.”
To donate to Moving for Mohi, which is fundraising for Starship’s Air Ambulance, visit kilometresforkids.org.nz/t/moving-for-mohi
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