Most of us women will experience guilt when a rule has been broken or we’ve gone against what our values are.
By definition, guilt is a form of moral compass, guiding us through life, teaching us lessons and keeping us on track. However, guilt is a powerful emotion and can take over. If we feel it everyday due to daycare pick-ups, gym attendance or the food we eat, then we need to recognise this as a sign that changes need to be made immediately.
Eliminate guilt
If you experience continual guilt, it can be a signal that your inner needs are not being met. Take a moment to examine your priorities, values and life choices. Write them down.
The relationship between self-care and guilt is strong, so the more you care for your wellbeing, the less you experience guilt and vice versa. Be clear on what nourishes you and fiercely protect these things from being overlooked.
Review your food by the week, not the mouthful
Too often, the slightest deviation from healthy food will make a person feel guilty, at which stage they decide there is no point continuing to eat well for the day or at all. Instead of chastising yourself for an unhealthy mouthful or meal, look instead at your food choices in the context of the full week.
A few unhealthy options out of a possible 20 to 30 meals (assuming you have three meals and two snacks per day) are acceptable.
Add vs subtract
Typically, our relationship with food is based on what we should refrain from eating. Deprivation vs abundance.
Start instead by deciding what wonderful foods you are going to introduce to your body – perhaps lemon and water in the morning, or a delicious fruit and vegetable smoothie, or a favourite healthy new recipe for dinner each week.
Once these new habits are formed, it then feels more positive to start reducing foods that you don’t want to eat.
Look at yourself kindly
Many women say that if they had a body they liked, they would have a more positive body image. But how about the reverse? If we feel positively about our body, we end up with a body we love. Stop for a moment. Look around at everything those beautiful eyes of yours can see. Your legs that can move with ease, run and climb stairs, arms that carry and hug, and fingers that can touch, write, hold hands and cook.
Further, our children are modelling our behaviour. Therefore, if we wish for them to have a robust, healthy body image, they must see that we have one. If our children hear us complaining and speaking negatively about our body, they too will begin to see aspects of themselves that they incorrectly think are not good enough. Be the gift of good self-worth to your children.
