Woman's Day
Miriama Kamo, mum Mary & daughter Te Rerehua
When Sunday host Miriama’s mum Mary was recently invested as a Companion of the New Zealand Order of Merit for her 33 years working as a prison chaplain, it was an emotional moment for the Christchurch resident.
“It was a privilege and I wasn’t expecting any reward for it,” the humble mother-of-five, 77, says of her former job. “There was nothing scary about the inmates. These women were survivors and I admired them. Often, prison was the first place where they’d had three meals a day and a warm bed to sleep in. I learned as much from them as I hope they learned from me.”
The investiture was a touching milestone for Miriama, 43, too. The TVNZ 1 star explains, “My mother amazes me. She’s put her heart, soul and back into helping other people, but she refuses to see it as selfless, as she says the work gives to her as much as she gives to it. It’s made me think, ‘How can I be of use? What am I doing to lift others up?’”
It has also made her reflect on how she’s raising her and husband Mike Dreaver’s daughter Te Rerehua, five. Miriama tells, “Mum’s parenting was wholehearted. She expected a lot from us, but she was also soft and loving. She showed me how to listen to my instincts, take note of my dreams and speak out for what is right. Being my mother’s daughter makes me want to be a better mother to my daughter.”
And Mary says Miriama is doing just fine. “She’s a great mum and Te Rerehua is such a joy,” the grandmother-of-13 grins. “She’s a very confident, happy, creative and clever little girl. I’m so proud.”
Matilda Rice & mum Di
When Matilda signed up for the first season of The Bachelor New Zealand, her mum Di had some sound advice for her – don’t!
“It’s fair to say I wasn’t a fan,” says the business owner. “It’s one of those things that could either go really well or really bad. I’m a feminist from way back, so we discussed things like misogyny and sexism, but ultimately, we all have to make our own decisions and live with the consequences.”
With Matilda and her leading man Art Green more in love than ever, the outcome couldn’t have been better, but Matilda insists her mum’s warning helped her go into the show with open eyes.
“She’s let me in on hundreds of pearls of wisdom over the years, but the greatest lesson she ever taught me is to never rely solely on anyone else,” says Matilda, 25. “Even if you’re in a relationship, it’s still so important to have your own financial independence and be able to stand on your own two feet.”
However, Di, 57, tells Woman’s Day she never doubted her determined daughter would find her own way in life. “One of the things we have in common is we are both strong-willed, which did mean we’d lock horns a bit when she was growing up, but I always believed everything would be OK in the end.
“Even when she was little, Matilda has always been such a happy, positive person who surrounded herself with a terrific circle of friends. She’s independent, lots of fun and she has a great sense of humour. In my books, she’s doing everything right.”
Matilda might be passing her mum’s test with flying colours, but how does Art stack up? “He’s delightful,” tells Di. “And like Matilda, I love him to bits.”
Laurel Devenie & mum Gillian Skyrme
Shortland Street star Laurel and her mother might live an eight-hour bus ride apart, but Gillian only has to turn on her TV to feel close to her daughter.
“It’s like having a little secret meeting with Laurel every evening,” smiles Gillian, a linguistics teacher in Palmerston North. “But if they ever play a whole episode that doesn’t feature Laurel at all, I do feel very short-changed.”
However, 65-year-old Gillian, who once dabbled in acting herself, admits she’s been spoilt with a lifetime of performances from her talented daughter. When Laurel was young, it became a family tradition to put on plays for her birthday, which her mum wrote and her dad, Meet the Feebles actor Stuart Devenie, directed.
“They weren’t small productions either,” Auckland-based Laurel, 34, remembers. “Dad had connections at the radio station, so for about four weeks ahead of my birthday, my friends and I would rehearse there. This was well before any of us could learn lines, so Mum would have to stand up the front and recite them to us line for line!”
While the Shorty siren – who plays nurse Kate Nathan on the TVNZ 2 soap – longed for Barbie dolls and McDonald’s while growing up in Whangarei, she now appreciates the simple, book-filled childhood that her unmaterialistic mum insisted on.
“Mum’s not decadent in any way and is acutely aware of her carbon footprint,” tells Laurel. “She eats out of her garden, cycles to work and feels guilty if there’s a spare room in her house –someone has to fill it!
“I really admire how Mum sustains herself in a world where people think they need everything. It wasn’t that she was strict – she was teaching me an important lesson I never knew I needed. I know I’ll be the same with my children.”
Dominic Bowden & mum Siobhan
At 1.9m, Dominic towers over his petite mother, but Siobhan says he’ll forever be her baby boy.
“When he was 14, he was as tall as he is now, so when I told him off – and I did quite a bit at that age – I had to make him sit down so we could be at eye level,” smiles the mum-of-three.
“For a long time, though, he was an only child, so I take full responsibility for spoiling our little man.”
Wrapping his dear mum in a giant hug, Dom jokingly apologises for the trouble he put her through as a teen. “At one point, she had to disconnect the phones and all but lock me in my room because I refused to do my schoolwork,” laughs the host of The Bachelor New Zealand.
“I know now everything Mum did, she did with my best interests at heart. There’s absolutely no way I’d be where I am today without her guidance and support.”
The duo – who enjoy travelling, eating out and exercising together – are so close that after our shoot, Dominic was treating his mum to a surprise bottle of champers and a luxury massage.
Kind-hearted and generous to a fault, Siobhan says her boy often gives her the VIP treatment, but this Mother’s Day, she doesn’t need presents. Now that Dom is back in NZ after a decade pursuing his showbiz career in Los Angeles, Siobhan has everything she needs right in front of her.
“It’s the ultimate gift,” she says. “We expected a lot from him being the eldest, but he continues to make me proud. He has such an infectious energy about him – he has a big heart and works hard, but he never lets his successes go to his head.”
Brodie Kane & mum Jo
When Jo became pregnant with her second child, she was adamant she wanted a brother for her son AJ.
“I just knew that girls were far more difficult, emotional, manipulative and bitchy,” she laughs.
When she discovered she was having a daughter, she cried for a whole day. But fast-forward 30 years and Jo’s girl Brodie, a reporter on TVNZ 1’s Breakfast, is her best friend.
Jo smiles, “From the moment she arrived, she was just wonderful, so chubby and happy. I can’t imagine life without a daughter now. We’re incredibly close. There’s nothing we can’t tell each other.”
Nodding, Brodie insists she’d be lost without her mother, explaining, “Growing up, Mum supported me 100% in anything I wanted to do. She’d be up at 5am to drive me to swimming, then to surf lifesaving. She’d be on the sidelines at every single game or event. She taught me resilience, hard work, determination and believing in myself.”
More recently, 61-year-old Jo has even taken on the mantle of matchmaker, regularly phoning single Brodie, 30, with suggestions of eligible bachelors. “I’m always on the prowl!” she jokes, although her daughter quips, “Sometimes her taste is a bit off.”
The mother-daughter duo are so close, they’ve recently bought a house together for Brodie, just 500m down the road from the family home in Waikuku Beach, near Christchurch. Auckland-based Brodie hopes it’ll mean spending more time with Jo and her dad Murray, something that’s become more important to her since her mum was recently hospitalised following complications after a knee replacement.
“The past year, I’ve felt the roles reversing and I had to be more like the parent,” admits Brodie. “I was really scared because I’d never seen Mum in pain or vulnerable before. She was so sick that it made me very protective of her.”
Smiling, Jo tells, “I couldn’t have got through all that without Brodie. I’m incredibly proud of her. She’s the best daughter in the world!”
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