Hilaria Baldwin appears broken but determined to begin healing after sharing on social media this week that she has miscarried her fifth child at four months pregnant. It has been her second miscarriage this year.
The mother of four had happily announced she was pregnant with her fifth child in September, after suffering a miscarriage earlier in the year in April.
"The sound of this strong heart makes me so happy - especially because of the loss we experienced in the spring," she said.
However, this week the Hollywood actress, who is married to Alec Baldwin, took to Instagram to share the devastating news that she has lost this pregnancy also.
"We are very sad to share that today we learned that our baby passed away at 4 months," she wrote. "We also want you to know that even though we are not ok right now, we will be. We are so lucky with our 4 healthy babies - and we will never lose sight of this."
She shared a video of her daughter Carmen comforting her, asking Hilaria how long it would be before another baby would come. Hilaria told her daughter in reply that she didn't know but she'd try really hard.
She explained in her caption: "I told Carmen and took this so I could send it to Alec. I guess this is a good way to share it with you too. I told her that this baby isn't going to come after all...but we will try very hard to give her a little sister another time. I'm really devastated right now...I was not expecting this when I went to my scan today. I don't know what else to say...I'm still in shock and don't have this all quite clear. Please no paparazzi...that's all I ask ❤️"
The grieving mother posted a second message on Instagram today:
"Eyes swollen from crying, groggy from anesthesia, crampy from the surgery...but I made it and I want you to know that I'm physically ok. I'm grateful for my family, friends, doctors and nurses, and all of you who have held my hand through this difficult time. You have no idea how much this means to me. One foot in front of the other...now I begin the healing journey ❤️"
Hilaria is known for including her fans in her pregnancy journeys - the highs and the lows - to "normalise" the experiences women can have.
When she suffered her first miscarriage in April she shared what she was going through on Instagram as the miscarriage unfolded.
"I want to share with you that I am most likely experiencing a miscarriage," she posted in April. "I always promised myself that if I were to get pregnant again, I would share the news with you guys pretty early, even if that means suffering a public loss.
"I have always been so open with you all about my family, fitness, pregnancies...and I don't want to keep this from you, just because it isn't as positive and shiny as the rest. I think it's important to show the truth...because my job is to help people by being real and open.
"Furthermore, I have no shame or embarrassment with this experience. I want to be a part of the effort to normalize miscarriage and remove the stigma from it. There is so much secrecy during the first trimester. This works for some, but I personally find it to be exhausting.
"I'm nauseous, tired, my body is changing. And I have to pretend that everything is just fine - and it truly isn't. I don't want to have to pretend anymore. I hope you understand."
- FitnessRunning just once a week lowers your risk of early death - here's how to get started
Good Health ChoicesToday 10:00am
- CareerMeet Christine Fernyhough - the intrepid Auckland housewife who took on a high country farm and won
The Australian Women's WeeklyYesterday 10:00am
- RelationshipsJay-Jay Feeney dishes on her sizzling summer with her 'toyboy' Minou
Woman's DayYesterday 8:00am
- MindHilary Barry's perfect clap back at a viewer: ‘Enough with the age-shaming’
Now To LoveJan 24, 2020
- Diet & NutritionDiet and ‘detox’ teas have been pulled from New Zealand shelves
Now To LoveJan 23, 2020
- CareerNigella Lawson's new direction at 60: 'I feel so much more open to anything and everything'
New Zealand Woman's WeeklyJan 23, 2020
- WeddingsIt's love-all for tennis star Michael Venus as he marries the mother of his child
Woman's DayJan 23, 2020