Sharing houses is hard, and as rents and mortgages rise – more and more of us are having to share our space with randoms. Here are some of the biggest red flags people have experienced from those they’re flatting with.
Dish soakers
“A shitty roommate will always leave dishes in the sink ‘to soak’ before cleaning them.”
Mi casa, su casa attitude
“A ‘mi casa, su casa’ attitude, where they think everything is shared without asking first, raid your shelf on the fridge, invite their dumb stoner/boozehead/noise-loving friends without talking to you first, and get offended when you don’t share the clean-up.”
First-timers
“People who are coming from mom and dad’s house for the first time. You just never know what they’re used to having other people do for them.”
Bill dodgers
“If they are vague about bills. Make sure that you both agree to leave bills in a common area or divide the utilities as you see fit from the beginning. This same roommate worked swing while I worked an 8am-5pm shift, so she was always there when the mail came. She would take the mail and then just verbally say what the bill charged and ask me for half the money. If I asked to see the bill she would act like I was being shady or like I was rude for not trusting her, or make an excuse about showing me the bill later but never doing so. I later found out I pretty much always paid the electric bill in full, even though her fat ass was home watching tv and leaving every light on until I got home.”
Strange pets
“When your roommate has turtles…. Now my whole fridge is filled w kale and my living room filled with dandelion plants. SOS.”
Breaking Bad
“When they ask ‘hey, do you mind if I cook meth in the kitchen on weekends?’”
Litter bug
“He’ll just start eating cheap precooked food from the gas station and leaving the wrappers rotting around the apartment. And occasionally make the one food he knows how to make – spaghetti – which requires two pots, a strainer, a can opener, three or four bowls and a pile of silverware, and it, along with every surface in your kitchen, is speckled with dried tomato sauce.”
Bad hippy
“Do not room with a hippy. EVER. If they self identify as a hippy, or celebrate the hippy lifestyle, just move on. You can understand a statement of hippyness to mean that they will ignore basic human decency and practical convention.”
Abusers of the non-stick frying pan
“This is very minor compared to some of the other things in this thread, but it has prevented me from committing murder: ask if they own any non-stick cookware. If they do, ask to see it. If it’s not all scratched to hell, it’s probably safe to leave yours in the kitchen for shared use. Otherwise, if it has a single scratch in it or if they don’t own any, yours needs to stay under lock and key.”
