Dear Diane,
Since I became a mother I’ve found myself getting so confused about all the things that are supposed to be bad for my child – and everybody tells a different story. There’s breast vs bottle and whether the plastic bottle is dangerous. I have friends who are anti-vaccine and while I decided the benefits far outweigh the risks, that was a worrying decision to make too. Now I’m terrified of giving my son peanuts in case he has an allergy.
Sally
Dear Sally,
Psychologist Barry Schwartz wrote a book called The Paradox of Choice – Why More Is Less, in which he maintained that eliminating consumer choices can greatly reduce anxiety for shoppers. When we listen to our friends or family, they try to persuade us to see things their way. The internet can be helpful. Google questions like, “Is breast or bottle best?” You’ll still get lots of conflicting replies, but they will be impersonal and without urgency. Although I value the scientific answers, I also like the “mum” responses. The latter are often the source of a great deal of common sense. My current favourite is, “If you are going to introduce a new food, do it early in the day. That way, if your child does have a response to it, you will be able to seek help easily instead of panicking in the middle of the night.” Pick out one or two people whose wisdom you value and use them as sounding boards.
Diane Levy provides expert answers to your parenting queries. Send your questions to: [[email protected]](mailto: [email protected]). Diane’s parenting books are available in book shops.
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