They say mother knows best and often the ideal person to teach you about being a good parent is your own mum. We rounded up a bunch of women to share the advice their mothers gave them on the all-important topic of raising children.
One of the best things my mum told me was kids need routines. I really struggled with that with my oldest child but by the time numbers two and three came along I had a routine and they were much easier to deal with as they knew what to expect.
Nicky
My mum always told us, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all!”
Genevieve
Mum knows best, so trust yourself. This is very helpful when you have a newborn.
Stacey
Don’t compare your kids to each other or to other kids. They develop at their own pace – that’s what makes them special.
Jo
You don’t suddenly turn into Wonder Woman when you give birth. Don’t expect yourself to be perfect and don’t be too hard on yourself if you can’t get everything done. Don’t feel guilty, and give yourself time off. You’re only human!
Karen
The most important thing my mother told me is that your children are not mini versions of yourself. They’re unique little people with their own likes and dislikes, abilities and challenges, hopes and dreams, personality traits and behaviour. I found this really useful in dealing with my disappointment over the fact that neither of my children has inherited my musical talent. It was hard at first, but now I accept that they have their own talents.
Jackie
Never go to bed on bad terms. This applies to children as well as partners!
Angela
If you are your teenager’s best friend then you aren’t doing your job as their mother. It’s great to get on with your child, but you aren’t there to be their friend – you’re there to set and enforce rules, and to teach them how to deal with life. If they’re mad at you about something, you’re probably doing a good job!
Caroline
Don’t use food as a way of rewarding or consoling your children. This advice actually came from my mother-in-law, who has battled her weight all her life. She says she has an unhealthy attitude towards food largely due to her mother giving her biscuits and lollies whenever she was upset or unhappy, or if she had done something particularly well. Now she has this attitude that food will make her feel better and that has been a problem. She doesn’t want any of her grandchildren to develop this way of thinking about food.
Rachel
My mother always told me it’s important to let your children make their own mistakes. Otherwise, how are they going to learn? Obviously you don’t let them do things that could be dangerous or stupid, and you have to prepare them to deal with things that could go wrong, but you can’t keep them bundled up in cotton wool all their lives.
Marama
I’ll always remember my nana saying, “You can’t spoil kids, you can only love them.”
Raewyn
This has always been great advice in our family, “Give your children 100% of what they need and 50% of what they want.”
Julie
Always tell your kids you love them – even when they’re 17 and it embarrasses them! My mum used to do this to us and now I make a point of doing it to my teenagers.
Louise
Don’t neglect your husband. My mother-in-law learned this the hard way. She was so busy raising five kids – and trying to run a business – that she ended up virtually ignoring her husband and in the end he had enough and left. Kids are important but so is your marriage.
Chrissie
My mother always used to say, “This too shall pass,” and I kept thinking that when I was up in the night with a baby who couldn’t sleep, or dealing with a toddler throwing a tantrum. They will move on. Just don’t think too much about what the next stage might be!
Corrina
Don’t make promises you can’t keep. My father did this all the time and Mum could see how devastated us kids were when he didn’t deliver. If you have any doubts about being able to go through with your promise, don’t make it. Don’t let children down.
Liz
Pick your battles and make sure you enjoy every moment with your children, because they fly the nest too quickly. But most importantly, have fun!
Melissa
My dear mum taught me that children are the most precious things you will ever have in your life. Love them, nurture them and look after them well, because before you know it they will be off on their own.
Helen
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