There’s no getting around it – at some stage, you are going to have to talk to your kids about drugs. How you tackle the subject can have a big impact on their attitude towards using illegal drugs and their ability to resist peer pressure. Here are some tips on what to say:
It’s never too early to talk about drugs
If you’ve had the conversation long before they get to the age where they have access to drugs – usually before secondary school – they’ll know what to expect and will have strategies in place to enable them to say no. Use your judgment about when to bring up the subject. It will depend on your child’s age and level of maturity. If drugs are mentioned in a TV show or on the news, start a conversation. “Do you understand what they’re talking about when they mention drugs?” is a good opener.
Pick your time wisely
Although it is a good idea to seize opportunities to talk about drugs when the subject comes up, it’s best not to talk to them when you have limited time, can’t have a face-to-face conversation somewhere private or, heaven forbid, if they are high. Make sure they can focus on what you are saying and there are no distractions.
Do your research
Don’t just say to your kids, “Drugs are bad, don’t take them.” Know what you are talking about. Provide solid facts about why drugs are bad – for example, some research suggests that drug use in teenage years may increase the risk of developing a mental illness, possibly due to changes in brain chemistry caused by drugs. Make sure they know about addiction and how hard it is to kick a drug habit.
Leave them in no doubt about where you stand
Don’t send mixed messages. If you are completely anti-drugs, let them know you are and why. If you set clear boundaries, it will help if they find themselves in a situation where they may be tempted. Knowing what your reaction will be can help to give them strength when it comes to saying no. Also ensure they know the consequences if they did take drugs – to their health and wellbeing, and the response they will get from you.
Listen as well as talk
It’s all very well talking to them, but you need to pay attention to what their response is. Don’t assume you know what they will say. Let them tell you about their experiences and concerns in their own words.
Stick with it
Don’t be put off if they clam up, get embarrassed or walk away. It’s as difficult for them to have this conversation as it is for you. If you don’t get the chance to talk about everything, then bring up the subject again later.
Teach them about responsibility
As their parent, you are doing your best to help them make good choices. But they need to understand that they are the only ones who can say no to drugs. So ensure they know you support them in this.
If you’ve used drugs
Be honest. But don’t tell funny stories about the stupid things you did when you were high – it sends the wrong message. Let them know that experimenting with drugs is something many teenagers consider, but everyone has different experiences. It’s impossible to tell who will have really bad experiences, which is why it is best to steer clear altogether.
