Lisa Dobson looks like any other adoring young mum as she walks hand-in-hand with her preschooler Tristan, snuggling in for a giggle on a mild autumn day in Dunedin.
With her glossy hair and vibrant smile, it’s hard to believe she has been in and out of hospital in recent weeks battling crippling pain after being diagnosed with a rare breast cancer two years ago.
Until last week, Lisa’s friend Delwyn Short (44) had been furiously raising money so Lisa could receive vitamin C infusions – an alternative treatment not clinically proven or funded in New Zealand, but that has been shown to slow growth in some types of aggressive tumours.
It’s the miracle the 34-year-old and her husband Stephen had been holding out for, but sadly, just days before Lisa’s birthday on Good Friday, they were dealt a devastating blow.
Lisa has between two to four months to live. Her tumours have multiplied on her liver and the tumour in her kidney has grown. Her pain is likely linked to a new growth that is pressing on her pancreas. Vitamin C is out of the question.
“At the moment, I’m on continuous morphine,” Lisa, who has triple negative breast cancer, tells. “I haven’t had the energy to look after my son, so he’s been frequently sent away to family which makes me so upset because I don’t get to see him. I feel like I should be able to look after him – that I shouldn’t be a sick mother who has cancer. But I am.”
The young mum refers to three-year-old Tristan as her “wee hero”.
At just three years old, Tristan only knows Mummy is “sore”. She can’t pick him up when he wants her to and he’s seen all the bruises on Lisa’s stomach from the regular injections she has. Tristan can’t understand why Mummy’s not all better yet and how, even after countless trips there, the hospital hasn’t fixed her.
A smile spreads across Lisa’s face when she describes her little boy. “He’s like my wee hero, he keeps it real,” she says.
The stream of bad news has also weighed heavily on Lisa’s husband Stephen, who says his wife is a pro at putting on a brave face.
Lisa (left) and her “guardian angel” Delwyn.
“You wouldn’t look at Lisa and guess that she has secondary incurable cancer. You wouldn’t imagine it, with how good she’s looking” says Stephen with pride. “But she has these big tumours inside her and it’s taking her away from us. It’s very hard to talk about because death isn’t something you should be considering until you’re 80 or 90 years old.”
The couple had been married for only a year and a half when Lisa first found a lump in her breast in October 2014.
While she thought it might be a blocked duct – having recently finished breastfeeding Tristan – it was Stephen who urged her to immediately see her doctor.
There was very little concern at first, due to her age and the fact she had no family history of breast cancer, and the doctor told Lisa to go home and come back in a month.
During that time, the lump grew. Stephen was shocked when Lisa told him the results of her biopsy.
“We were so sure it wasn’t serious that I had gone away hunting – so when Lisa phoned and said it was cancer, I had to arrange a plane to come and get me” tells Stephen. “Now it’s all we think about. Every time we get more bad news, it’s another kick in the guts.”
Lisa is overwhelmed and grateful for the support of her friend Delwyn, who was also battling breast cancer when the pair met at a Look Good Feel Better workshop two years ago.
Despite an age gap of almost 10 years, they quickly developed a deep friendship. To see her young, vibrant friend suffering is heartbreaking for Delwyn, who is currently in the clear herself.
“Every time I see a photo of Lisa, she sparkles, and when I see this gorgeous girl smile, it just blows me away,” Delwyn says with tears in her eyes. “One day, she can get this awful news and the next day, she says, ‘I’m feeling better today’ and she’ll have a giggle. She’s such a lovely mother and a good wife.”
Through a Givealittle page and auctions of donated items, Delwyn has raised more than $8500 for Lisa. Vitamin C infusions have now been ruled out because of the risk it could crystalise in Lisa’s kidneys, but Delwyn is keeping the page going – all funds will now go to the family so they can spend the next few precious months together.
Lisa says she is touched by the support she has received and thanks the people who have helped her. But what the brave young mum really wants is for people to learn from her story.
“I want to say to anyone out there who notices any slight changes to their breasts that no matter how young you are, please get yourself checked as soon as possible because it could save your life.”
To donate to Delwyn’s cause for Lisa, click here
For more information about breast cancer, talk to the New Zealand Breast Cancer Foundation.
