It’s traditionally been the man’s job. They ask the father, find the ring, get down on one knee and ask the woman of their dreams for their hand in marriage. However, once every four years, tradition decrees that during a leap year on February 29, women have the opportunity to take matters into their own hands and propose to their men.
Kate Atkenson (née Colgate) was one such woman who didn’t want to wait for her man to pop the question. Instead of pining for the day her boyfriend of one year, Lewis Atkenson, would propose, the Hastings woman decided to “man up” and ask him herself.
“It wasn’t a matter of him not doing it or anything, I just knew what I wanted, so I asked him. “I’m pretty determined – I get what I want!” she laughs. Lewis (30) says while he knew something was going on, he had no idea a marriage proposal was about to come his way.
“She was acting a bit different, but I wasn’t 100% sure what was happening. I was definitely surprised!” Not fazed by taking on the traditional male role, Kate decided on a romantic stroll through the local park as the perfect setting.
“It was our one-year anniversary, so we’d gone out for tea. We went for a walk afterwards and stopped at a random park bench, and I just did it.” Kate (25) says she wasn’t nervous about asking Lewis, despite theories of men feeling threatened when women take on the responsibility of proposing.
“I never thought he’d be insulted or anything, he’s just such a casual, placid guy and he probably never would have gotten around to doing it. “We’d never talked about marriage before, but I knew he’d say yes. The thought he’d say no never crossed my mind. I was quietly confident!”
As for Lewis, he was more than happy for Kate to be the driving force behind the marriage proposal. “It took something off my plate!” he grins.
Kate even took Lewis’ mum out to lunch the same day she proposed to ask her permission to marry her son. “She was surprised, but really excited. She said we should’ve gone out for a drink instead.”
When it came to the big question however, Lewis admits that at first he didn’t realise a genuine marriage proposal had been made. “I said, ‘Will you marry me?’ but he thought it was a general question. He said, ‘Oh, yeah, sure,’ and I was like, ‘I’m serious!’” Kate says.
As soon as he figured out the question was authentic, Lewis gladly accepted. The couple, who wed in Rarotonga in November, say women shouldn’t be put off asking their men to marry them. “There are girls who are waiting and waiting. Why be bitterly disappointed or angry? Why not just do it yourself and get it over with?” Kate says.
And Lewis agrees. “Well, if you’re sick of waiting, you might as well do something about it!”
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