Pinned beneath the roof of the collapsed Christchurch Press building, Stacey Herbert closed her eyes and hoped to die.
Trapped for eight hours under a pile of concrete and steel following the deadly quake, Stacey was so petrified, she became convinced that dying would be preferable.
Now recovering from losing both her legs after they were crushed, Stacey, a former promotions model, still has her bad days. “I have moments when I think maybe somebody else should’ve survived instead,” says Stacey in an exclusive interview with the Weekly.
Thankfully the love of her family and new husband have helped Stacey (24) realise she does have a positive future.
“I’m lucky I have the chance to walk again,” she says.
Her wedding to childhood sweetheart Nick Herbert (24) was a high point during the five long months she spent in hospital. The couple exchanged vows in oay at the Christchurch Hospital chapel, which was packed with 80 guests, including 30 doctors and nurses.
Stacey wore a gown with a sweetheart neckline, especially designed and hand-beaded for her free of charge by local designer oinh Phan, with a sleeve to hide the tubes that were inserted in her arm.
Stacey was wheeled up the aisle to over the Rainbow and the couple vowed to “love each other in earthquakes and in disagreements”.
When the couple became engaged in october last year, they thought their wedding day was years away. But after the quake, marrying Nick became a priority for Stacey. “I wanted to marry the guy I love,” says Stacey.The couple are now planning to have a larger ceremony with a full bridal party next year, when Stacey aims to walk down the aisle.
Stacey’s first leg was amputated almost immediately after she was freed from the rubble. Three days later, her second leg was amputated above the knee, due to the toxins released when she was crushed.
But because Stacey was kept in a medically induced coma for a month, there was never a time when she suddenly realised she had lost her legs.
It was only once she was fully conscious that she begun to grieve. “I was thinking, ‘Why me? Why did this happen? What did I do wrong?'”
Stacey recalls sitting at her desk on her lunch break on the day of the earthquake. “I remember feeling the shaking and seeing the wall swaying. Then that wall was falling on me. I was knocked out for a couple of minutes.
“When I woke I had concrete and beams on top of me – I was trapped. It felt like forever before I knew help was coming.
“I couldn’t move at all. I was lying on my side but I couldn’t feel any pain. I thought I was going to die – which I tried to do by falling asleep because it was the worst feeling being trapped. But I couldn’t sleep.”
Hearing Nick’s voice, when he arrived at the building after finding out his fiancée was trapped, was something for Stacey to hold on to. “It made me feel much better.”
It took hours for rescuers to reach Stacey, eventually drilling a square in the roof and concrete to climb down to reach her.
When they pulled her free, her heart necklace, which had been a gift from Nick seven years before, was broken and left at the scene. But six weeks later Stacey’s rescuers returned to the collapsed building and found it for her.
Stacey is now living in a Burwood Hospital rehabilitation unit with Nick. They are planning to move into his parents’ house while they wait to build their own home.
Not being able to move freely is Stacey’s biggest issue but she says the mental trauma is almost worse. “Everything is hard. You can’t just grab the remote, or go to the kitchen.”
Her injuries have also put an end to her part-time job as a promotions model at special events. “It’s not like I’m going to go on stage in my bikini again.”
When life gets too tough, Stacey practises deep breathing and distracting herself from her problems. “It’s not easy – I’ve not only lost my legs but also the life I had. But I’m lucky I have the ability and the chance to walk again.”
Stacey now has prosthetic legs and prefers not to go out in public without them, and she has the option of returning to her job in credit services. She also feels some good has come from the disaster. “I’m meeting people I wouldn’t have met if it hadn’t have happen and I’ve learned who my true friends are.”
