Dear Wendyl,
I’ve been having an affair with someone I shouldn’t be having an affair with and I really want to stop, but he won’t let me. I tell him it’s over and sort myself out, but then he texts or calls and I just can’t say no. Meanwhile, I know that it’s only a matter of time before I get caught out and ruin my marriage. How do I find the strength to end the affair for good?
Over and Out, by email
Dear Over and Out,
Perhaps you don’t really want it to end? Have you thought about that? I believe people who have affairs do so because they’re unhappy in their marriage and rather than put the work into sorting that out and finding happiness again, they take the easy option: a lover. Why not examine your marriage and find out why you felt it was okay to cheat on your husband, and see where that gets you? I believe that by getting some counselling or working together with your husband you will get some answers.
Send your questions to [email protected] or write to Agony Aunt, NZWW, PO Box 90119, Victoria St West, Auckland 1142.
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