It’s 11.59pm on New Year’s Eve and Breakers star Tom Abercrombie is sitting anxiously in a jet on the tarmac of Auckland Airport, Champagne glass in hand, waiting for his plane to finally roll up to the gate.
Having just flown 12 hours from Cairns, Australia, leaving his teammates behind to play on without him, all Tom wants to do is to get home to eight- months pregnant wife Monique (25), who hours earlier called to tell him that their first child simply wouldn’t wait, and to get home – now!
But of course, it’s never that easy.
The devoted father’s new year got off to a flying start – the first cuddle with his beautiful boy Pilot.
“The airline lost my bag,” Tom (28) remembers, rolling his eyes and grinning as he gently rocks his six-week-old son, Pilot Gibbie Abercrombie, who’s sleeping in his dad’s strong arms.
“So, all in all, it wasn’t the most restful flight! Even though I was pretty comfortable I would make it back in time, it was weird thinking, ‘Oh, I’m going to be a dad when I get home!’”
Tom and Monique are thrilled to introduce little Pilot, who made his grand entrance at 2.50am on January 2, with Tom receiving the first cuddle.
His three-weeks premature arrival was due to pre-eclampsia, Monique explains, a condition she didn’t even know she had.
“I had no idea, it was late-onset,” she tells. “I put on 32.5kg in my pregnancy, so much weight that I weighed more than Tom at the end! But we just figured that was normal because we’d never done this before. I was so swollen – I looked like a whale!”
When her obstetrician assessed her, then explained her condition was serious enough that she’d need to have the baby within 48 hours, a relatively calm Monique quickly got on the phone to her husband and told him to get himself home.
“There was no panic, though – we’re very organised people, so we had bags packed and everything already,” Monique recalls.
From there, everything happened extremely quickly.
“There was no need to fully induce me, as had been the plan,” says Monique. “I was ready to go.”
The pair made their way to North Shore Hospital, where Tom says the worst part of the whole experience was hearing the other mums in labour as he paced up and down the corridor.
“The most horrible sound ever,” he says, his eyes wide.
Tom and Monique’s first-born is proving to be a dream baby – he’s a good sleeper, loves the car and pram, and doesn’t really cry.
“He came back into my room pale-faced – he was scared,” laughs Monique. “But I had an epidural – the most amazing pain relief ever – so I was okay. I didn’t really feel anything.”
It was Tom and Monique’s dream to have a silent birth, and the new mum is proud to say they achieved it.
“It was really calm – we had dim lighting, no noise and it was peaceful,” she says.
It was also quick. After a mere four hours of active abour, Pilot was born.
“It was pretty crazy,” Tom says with a tender smile. “Having that first hold was so special. Usually it’s the mum who gets the first cuddle but this was something Mon wanted. It was nice to have that little bonding moment with my son straight off the bat. I was crying my eyes out when he finally arrived, just because I was overcome with joy and happiness – and relief that he was finally here!”
Monique says it’s tough deciding who Pilot takes after.
“He looked exactly like Tom when he was born. He was a bit jaundiced, so at first I thought he’d have my olive skin – but that went away and now he’s definitely got the Scottish tan going,” she laughs, referencing her husband’s fair appearance.
“I just thought he looked like a baby,” Tom says, shrugging.
There was no hesitation as to what to name their first son – in fact, Tom and Monique had the names Pilot and Gibbie picked out for years. They’d even included it – along with a girl’s name – in their wedding vows last year.
“Ah, the name,” Monique says, grinning. “I know it’s definitely different, but that’s what we wanted, and it sounds nice.”
Continues Tom, “I like Lotty for short too. And I got to pick the middle name, Gibbie, which was my granddad’s name. He passed away when I was younger. We love the name!”
But it hasn’t found favour with everyone in the family.
“My grandmother doesn’t like it,” admits Monique. “She said, ‘What? Spell it out? Oh, well, that’s nasty.’ She rang the next day and asked if we’d changed it yet! But it’s the 21st century… and she’s 95. It’s okay, everyone has their opinion.”
Now six weeks old, Pilot is displaying both his parents’ calm personalities.
“He’s an angel,” says Monique. “He was born into a calm environment, so hopefully it continues!” she grins.
“Other mums keep saying to me, ‘Don’t say that, just you wait!’ But he sleeps for six hours during the night, he doesn’t really cry, he loves the car and the pram, and he sleeps through noise. Motherhood has been quite easy so far!”
In fact, the new parents look well rested considering they have a newborn – something they put down to balance and routine.
“Monique does the night stuff, then I go to training in the morning and come home, so she has the afternoon off,” Tom explains. “To be honest, things haven’t changed that much for us because Pilot is sticking to the schedule!”
The new parents have recently been sure to celebrate their little one’s arrival by going out and having all the food Monique was unable to have while pregnant, treating themselves to Champagne, oysters and blue cheese.
“I’m not able to breastfeed,” explains Monique, “but one of the upsides of that is that anyone can feed him, and I don’t get separation anxiety when I’m away from him. We have such great support, so we still have a few date nights.”
Tom and Monique have also embraced parenting gadgets.
There’s the ingenious nappy disposal system that neutralises odours. “Anything to make that smell disappear is good,” Tom says with a frown – and the MamaRoo, a capsule that gently rocks from side-to-side, complete with rain, ocean or cicada noises.
“That’s been a life-saver – it’s like having grandma here all the time,” Monique enthuses. “But the best one is the baby monitor – it’s linked to Tom’s phone, so wherever he is in the world, he can look at Pilot and talk to him through the speaker.”
Pilot is just beginning to show off a little personality and the gassy smiles he’s been flashing are slowly turning into real ones.
No mistaking who Pilot’s dad is. The nursery is decorated in grey and cream. The couple have high hopes their boy will love basketball like his father.
“He changes so much, so quickly,” Tom says. “I’ll go away for a few days with the Breakers and I’ll come back, and he’s different – there’ll be a few more rolls under his chin.”
And, of course, his parents hope that Pilot will grow up to be a basketballer.
“No pressure, though!” Monique laughs.
“‘Pilot Flies High’– that could be a good newspaper headline,” Tom nods with a huge smile.
Pilot’s already proved to be a lucky charm too – the first Breakers game he attended, his dad scored 19 points.
“It’s hard to believe sometimes – in 12 months, we bought a house, got married and had a baby,” Monique says. “It’s been the best year ever.”
“And we’re so proud of Pilot already,” Tom adds, grinning. “We can’t wait for the next one!”
Words: Kelly Bertrand
