As one of the divas in The Real Housewives of Auckland, Louise Wallace has spent a lot of time surrounded by women this year. But Annie Whittle, Lisa Chappell and Darien Takle, her fellow cast members in the upcoming play The Pink Hammer, swear there are none of the catfights and slanging matches that have made the reality series so popular when they’re together.
“Well, we can’t stand Lou but apart from that, we’re great,” jokes Lisa. “Actually, we’re rehearsing in a church so we have to behave ourselves,” says Darien. “We couldn’t be carrying on like those women.”
The actors are having a ball rehearsing for Michelle Amis’ play about four women who turn up to a woodworking course, seeking empowerment and sisterhood. But when their instructor Maggie vanishes, they find themselves stuck with a sullen bloke (Paul Glover), who is reluctant to let them play with his toys.
“It’s a really smart, funny script,” says Louise, who is also producing the play for her theatre company Tadpole Productions.
“As soon as you start acting it, it just comes to life and it’s hilarious. I underestimated how funny it was. And this cast is amazing.”
Director Janice Finn picked the cast, but Louise admits that as producer, she had some influence.
“Obviously, I don’t want to be on stage with anyone I dislike. I’m very fussy as I just want it to be a fun experience.”
And for those who might be questioning whether she should have been cast, she is unapologetic.
“The luxury of having your own theatre company is that you can cast yourself. The risk, including the financial risk, is all mine. The day I think I’ve lost the plot or can’t pull my weight on stage, then I won’t be treading the boards.
“It doesn’t matter how good an actor you are. There will always be a time when you need to make your own work. I have to battle people who have a preconceived notion of me. I’m a trained actor and I’m the best person for the role.”
Louise is known as “bossy” in the reality show Real Housewives of Auckland (above), but Annie says she found her “gracious”.
She is thrilled to finally be acting alongside Annie. The pair have wanted to work together since Louise directed Annie in Driving Miss Daisy in 2013.
Although Louise has been accused of being the bossiest of the Housewives, Annie describes her as a very patient director.
“At the time, I didn’t know her at all, except as a fairly formidable journalist,” says Annie. “She was patience personified, knew exactly what she wanted and reined us in very graciously – not that she needed to rein George Henare in, him being such a consummate actor.
Annie’s character aged about 30 years in Miss Daisy, from a woman in her sixties through to her nineties.
“At the time, my mum was in her 90s and in a nursing home in Christchurch,” Annie says.
“I used to visit her every two weeks, so I was able to observe her physicality, her painfully slow movements and so replicate the ageing process on stage. It was really special for me spending this precious time with Mum and then trying to embody her in the play.”
(L to R): Lisa Chappell, Darien Takle, Annie Whittle, and Louise.
Annie loves working with Louise again.
“I don’t generally get to choose who I go on stage with, but having said that, whenever I’m offered a play, I always ask who’s in the cast. With this one, I was away overseas when I was offered the role and so I didn’t initially even know what the play was all about. I accepted on the basis of the cast and the director.”
“And now she’s realised she’s made the biggest mistake of her life,” hoots Louise.
“Nonsense,” laughs Annie. “I love my character. She doesn’t have a lot to say, but when she does say something, it’s quite noteworthy. It also means I don’t have to learn as many lines.”
Darien also has an advantage with her lines, having played her role before in an earlier production.
“It’s completely different this time, because it’s totally different energies with the different actors. It’s just been great fun and we’ve got a lovely token male, Paul, who is funny and fantastic, which is great.”
“Except that’s he’s not a token bloke, really,” counters Annie. “He’s got a big role. And a big journey in it just like the rest of us. We’ve all got our underlying issues that we have to come to terms with by the end of the play.”
For her part, Lisa is looking forward to being back at The Pumphouse, where she first went on stage as Portia in The Merchant of Venice.
“I’ve been playing some really heavy roles this year and I just loved the lightness of this character,” she says. “She’s just a bubble of joy.”
The women say they’ve been in fits of laughter during rehearsal – and not just because of their characters’ witty one-liners.
“We’re often laughing at Lou, creeping around the stage, trying to find her place to stand,” says Darien. “She actually lifted me up and physically put me somewhere else so she could be in my place the other day.”
“It must have been all of the Champagne I drank on Housewives, but I sometimes find myself skulking around in the background and wondering where I’m meant to be,” admits Louise. “I was just hoping that Janice the director hadn’t noticed! But in reality, I know she’s thinking, ‘What the hell is wrong with this woman?’”
The Pink Hammer plays at The Pumphouse Theatre in Takapuna, Auckland, from October 13 to 23. For tickets, go to pumphouse.co.nz.*
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